Oh yay Santa brought me a guillotine this year!! He’s just sorta standing next to it

a strange Mold is growing in my apartment and impairing my cognition. the world is healing..?

I recently opened a Speech Therapy clinic, but it's been tough getting the word out

doing my part in the battle against entropy. i never do any work

we should blend everybody up into One Huge Person

(gaunt, pallid specter of a man): yea i usually only need like 4 hours haha

need a fourth eye to accurately gauge how far in the future that stuff's gonna happen

wish they put it on my forehead :/

they opened my third eye in a Lab

meticulous process of trial & error putting together an outfit that has that "effortless" look

forgot to set my expression back to default and accidentally held a confused grimace all day

chose the wrong hole at amigara and came out all weird on the other end :/

ugh it feels like everywhere i go im surrounded by MORONS!!! i think it works like Stand users

why dont they make any other googly parts

Good News!!! you don’t die from lack of sleep! You can Stay Awake Forever!! you just get like psychosis or a heart attack or something like that

nursing the last sips of lukewarm water like im lost in the desert. jus dont wanna get up to refill it

bartender cut me off so I latched onto a patron instead

backing out of Plans has gotta be the best feeling in the World!! the onlookers seemed relieved too

never thought id see the day...

your son is Beautiful he looks like Shimmering Lights. may i hold him

window seat so i can try to punch out the window the whole flight

look to your left. look to your right. now look under your seat. there you'll find a gun,

inflated the balloons with Screams everybody at the party is Irritable

when I go to the dentist I gotta strip down I got Lots of Teeth

makes sense that the bouncer for heaven is a guy called Saint Beater

ai girlfriend got the ack :(

put on the They Live glasses and saw a Featureless White Void

didn't plan on taking a Nap today but I guess I succumbed to the Mold

my bed got that good mold im asleep before my head hits the pillow

No Melatonin No Counting Sheep all I need is Bed Mold