Sounds like burn out. Just remember, everything passes. Relax and you'll make it through this.

Ah ok, im sorry. With what youve been posting recently, I was scared for you

Please dont do anything rash harriet, talk if you need to. Ive been through tough times too, talking helps. My messages are open if you need an outlet.

Ooo big love to your style with her

Renamon

Remember to brush yer teeth!

#furryart

If you were receiving messages from randoms insulting you for days would you want to come back were it not your livelihood? Even if i could bust out some art now i wouldnt be posting it.

No problems, im glad I was able to impart something with my stream of conscience there

Its still worth it. How it was explained to me is that its a blood vessel contracting in your head, limiting blood hence messing with vision. The vessel eventually goes back to normal but can get too big and thats the headache as blood pulses through it. Caffeine regulates vein integrity.

And with your headaches, I get those aura ones too. I was told by my nuerologist that when you start feeling one, have a great big and strong coffee. Habe you tried thar before?

Well they're all bad versions, i wouldnt wish it on someone. The awareness is for the triggers of them. Can be many things depending on which part of the brain is having a tantrum.

Which just isnt the case for every form

Well, its not really stigmatising, more generalisation. It already feels bad having it, i habe dog tags around my neck in case i have one in public, and inform people im at events with, and the reaction is always sympathetic but incorrect, like oh no flashing lights and such.

After some messages from some concerned people, that Im touched by the concern of, this is not a farewell or anything leading to self harm. Just a message to people who may be in the same situation, there's still good out there, whatever ails you will pass.

Hopefully this website won't compress this to hell.

Thanks and yeah, epileptic for a while

Thanks man, and yeah youre right. It is lucky I have those willing to come around and check it out. Even if my dad did have to witness a fit. Its something you never want family or friends to see. They'll figure it out. It hasn't been this out of control since 2018.

Thank you. Ive had some more since writing this. Ive been fast tracked into the system for next weekend. Right now my parents are taking turns staying with me lol. I keep damaging myself.

And it's not really about me, its about how everyone is there for someone, whether they know it or not. And I think thats worth mentioning just with what's happening to me to hammer the point home.

archiveofourown.org/users/R_Bria... thats me

I appreciate it but not really. Its one of those wait kind of things that I just have to deal with. When youre stuck in hospital with nodes dug into your scalp, told to sleep theres not much else to do lol. Just reading the chats, you guys talking let's me know the world still moves, thats enough.

Thank you Saz, reading all the shenanigans brightens the day, even if im unable to partake in between the power off moments haha

I keep getting emails that people are still managing to go through my ao3 writings. So I'll just bring my laptop and do writings to pass the experience.

As a follow up, I will be in hospital again from the start of march. Its a depressing time for me. But my friends, my family, help me through this. You could be that anchor for someone and not even know it. Be there, you could be saving someone.

Last month I had a seizure that managed to split my head open. Earlier this week, two more. Im failing the clock test again and spellcheck is my saviour.

To anyone out there who knows someone in trouble, never ever underestimate what it means that youre even around. Its all the help in the world.

Well i got mixed messages in that regard. Did the lapses and what not. One said my style is too dissimilar to who my I inspirations are, other said they were too close. Theres no slicing it down the middle lol.

Thats fair, just some over protectiveness and rushing into things. Thats more reasonable.

If im honest, and i know its crass to say. I think the people with the torches just care about market share more than actually doing art. If they cared about their craft, they'd do it. Not spend every waking moment hunting for reasons to ruin others.

Ive not read them im sorry but I could look them up. My popular one is just an Xcom2 one and a whole bunch of short stories I wrote based around Darbaras' artwork. I'll look into the works though, the witch hunts have gotten crazy. Artists no longer drawing, just carrying torches.

My ao3 thankfully untouched. Some mates were saying various stuff is being wiped for no reason.