You swim in sewage filth and drive with dead animals in your car you are patient zero of everything in this country you even brought new shit here there's gonna be RFK Disease by the time you leave office/die/destroy the local water table whenever you're buried

VERY COOL PERSON: It's four-twenty, you know what that means?

ME: Hell yeah! [starts shoving blackbirds into a pie]

Share this with your friends who use ChatGPT to answer questions (and are fucking stupid and dumb)

As an Asian, cabbage is very good. As an American, I know when the media starts talking about how cabbage is very good it means we’re about to get real poor

A flatscreen display on a "smart" water fountain, demanding to be reconnected to the internet.

In 1999, I was playing a decker in Shadowrun, and tried to distract a guard by hacking a water fountain to overflow, and my GM said "why would a water fountain be on the network? That's fucking stupid. No you can't try."

Well it's 2026 and I just want you to know, Phil, that I FUCKING CALLED IT!

I don't recall any previous transformative technologies that had to be sold to the public so hard. No one in 1999 was going, "Guys. Cell phone? It's coming, whether we like it or not. I think it's important, FOR WOMEN ESPECIALLY, to learn about cell phone. So that we're not left behind!!"

Why do the Japanese like their buns askew (2026)

I like to imagine that Zohran Mamdani, Socialist African-born Muslim, was literally willed into existence by the collective psychosis of the Tea Party GOP over Obama, like the ectoplasm under NYC in Ghostbusters II

a screenshot of the "New Bestsellers" list from Substack, with Andrew Tate in the #1 position

Hey, look at Substack promoting Andrew Tate as the #1 new bestseller. The company's amoral leadership & backers will platform anyone, even ludicrously toxic rapists & human traffickers.

A belated Happy Birthday, dude!

JAMIE

Me, an atheist: Your holiness I stand ready to join the crusade against these heretics

It’s gotta be so fun to be into the Status Quo. Just looking around at the world being like “more of this please!”

books: the rectangle that can’t send you push notifications. Try: books.

genuinely think people outside of America don't realize how big this place is, how militarized and murderous our police are, how little our politicians care, how disconnected and impoverished we have been intentionally made to be, how we still have slavery just with extra steps. we really suck gang

I think the opposition party widely expected to make historic gains in the next election(s) has an obligation to explain how they'll stop this and prevent it from happening again or it's reasonable to conclude they don't plan on doing those things, which raises more uncomfortable questions

The current moment in tech is loosely understood as software guys getting so evil they made hardware guys discover Marxism from first principles.

It has come to my attention that not all of you are aware that this exists. So, here it is. It exists. Dozens of channels of randomized music videos and bumpers. Choose your era and return to your childhood. Bookmark it for when you need to escape back.

wantmymtv.vercel.app/player.html

I stay noided

“The nearly 70-page doc included no mention of contraception other than an assertion that it is overprescribed, has negative side effects, and is part of a broader ‘overreliance on pharmaceutical and surgical treatments.’”

Attacks on birth control will mirror those on abortion—lie, restrict, ban

Black and white picture of OCP officer Alex Murphy

Good Friday. Time to remember a man who died and returned days later to save us all.

Screenshot of Joker and Batman from the Adam West Batman series surfing. Joker says "Cowabunga, Bat-Drip! As surfers go, it looks like you're all wet! Ahahaha!", to which Batman replies "Shut the fuck up! Fuck you!"

Louis CK pulled out his penis in front of unwilling women and forced them to watch him masturbate. Just so we remember what men get away with, scot free

You've been Captain Jack'd