Lawyer tip: The best time to negotiate a contract is before you sign it. The second-best time is never, because it’s too late.

FRIENDLY LAWYER tip: If you’re signing an influencer deal, check who owns the content afterward. It might not be you.

Lawyer tip: If your “original” business logo looks like a knockoff of a famous one, prepare for a lawsuit.

Lawyer tip: Verbal agreements are legally binding sometimes. But proving them? That’s a whole circus you don’t want tickets to.

Lawyer tip: Copying most of something and changing a little bit is still stealing. Don’t let your DIY law degree tell you otherwise.

Good morning to everyone except me, who once again missed garbage day and is now in a committed relationship with three overflowing trash cans.

Good morning to everyone except the month of May, which somehow thinks we have a lot more energy than we do!

Lawyer tip: If your boss asks you to be a “1099 contractor” but treats you like an employee, you might be getting scammed.

Good morning to everyone except the policymakers who believe that defunding NPR and PBS will somehow lead to a more informed public???

Good morning to everyone except the person who told me to “romanticize my life” while I’m unloading the dishwasher for the fifth time in one day.

Good morning to everyone except the politician who says “I hear you” right before voting the opposite way.

Good morning to everyone except me, already regretting the Monday to-do list I wrote in a burst of false optimism last night.

Good morning to everyone except the policymakers still confused why women are just a little angry.

Before kids: a clean car.

After kids: a crumb-coated toy/sporting goods store on wheels with a faint smell of something forgotten???

Good morning to everyone except people who call it "a women's issue" when it’s actually a human rights issue.

Lawyer tip: If a landlord asks for security plus three months’ rent upfront, they’re probably breaking the law.

Good morning to everyone except the ones who say "family values" but mean "only if your family looks like mine."

Good morning to everyone except those who believe billionaires “earned” their wealth while teachers work three jobs.

(Hopefully) obvious lawyer tip: If you have to pay money to “claim” a prize, you’re not claiming a prize. You’re just paying.

Good morning to everyone except the folks trying to ban books they’ve clearly never read.

Good morning to everyone except the person who finished the coffee and put the empty pot back like it was full of dreams and caffeine.

Good morning to everyone except the people who say “just budget better” while grocery prices skyrocket.

Good morning to everyone except those who suddenly care about "due process" when it's their favorite celebrity accused.

Good morning to everyone except the lawmakers who are shocked by climate disasters they voted AGAINST preventing.

Lawyer tip: Using someone’s name, face, or voice in an ad without permission? That’s a lawsuit waiting to happen.

Good morning to everyone except those who think cancel culture is real but climate change isn’t.

Good morning to everyone except the folks yelling “free speech” while banning teachers from... well, you know, teaching things.

Hopefully obvious lawyer tip: Banks never call to ask for your password.

That’s a scam. Hang up.

Good morning to everyone except the guys who call women “too emotional” but lose their minds over a gas stove.

Good morning to everyone except the people who spent all of 2020 screaming about “personal freedoms” but now want to ban books and police uteruses.