Explaining China’s rise to Americans: Imagine a bigger burger

the way aunties are attracted to TJs totes like middle-aged men are to pokemon cards...

It’s inaccurate to say Mario is brave and Luigi is cowardly

Luigi is afraid of death, so he runs away from danger. Mario is afraid of living, so he runs towards death. Both brothers are cowards in their own way

sources tell me the head of the Chongqing Metro was a big fan of going to the dentist's office as a child

😊💙

A split bar chart of YouGov polling data with the headline: "Americans are most likely to say T. Rex is their favorite dinosaur, but many don't have a favorite." The chart has the sub-headline: "Which of the following is your favorite dinosaur? (%)." The chart has the note: "Note: "Other" includes responses of archaeopteryx, spinosaurus, plesiosaur, ankylosaurus, allosaurus, parasaurolophus, dilophosaurus, diplodocus, iguanadon, and pachycephalosaurus, as well as responses of "other." We know pterodactyls and plesiosaurs aren't dinosaurs. Opinion about dinosaurs comes from the question, "How much do you like or dislike dinosaurs?""

A shocking new poll result: Many Americans somehow don't have a favorite dinosaur.

And only 6% give the correct answer (triceratops).

Check out YouGov's new polling on Americans and dinosaurs: yougovamerica.substack.com/p/whats-your...

no i just think ur kinda dumb </3

from a fellow darth-follower and FIRSTer, hope we can see y'all in houston

Put the Pope on the blockchain.

by Andrew Yang

There are toilets everywhere for those with the eyes to see

this explains both the frequency of posting and the bad takes

your friend's discord account was compromised and has been replaced with a bot that only posts links to espn in the sports channel

Top headlines: Tiger arrested on suspicion of DUI after crash. Sources: Sun sold, will relocate to Houston in '27

another banner day for "if you didn't know sports were real, ESPN headlines would be crazy"

holy shit, dude

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Bald eagles are FUCKING ENORMOUS dawg if you have not seen one of these fuckers you have not been scared for your life and your children

in another "block everyone in chat" phase

I think I might have accidentally made three DLSS 5 jokes in 2014.

Chinese gamer banter is on a level we can't even hope to compete with

the niña
the pinta
the santa
maria

“I took the biggest shit in my pants. They all said it couldn’t be done.” Whole chamber takes a standing ovation. “Nobody’s ever seen a shit like this. 3000 years ago Sleepy Joe tried to shit, couldn’t do it.” Standing O, mic clips. “EVERYBODY’S JEALOUS OF HOW GREAT I AM, WOW.” Room chants USA.

The trajectory of the men’s hockey team over a blistering 12 hours

Old

so we paid the tariffs and now the corporations that passed the costs on to me and you are the ones that are going to be reimbursed, do i have that correct

homer's right. we've got the dud

New York City police officers rescued a bald eagle in distress during a patrol along the Hudson River. The authorities took the injured bird to a rehabilitation center in New Jersey, which is working to stabilize it to allow for further testing and treatment. nyti.ms/3OQvGtC

DOG AT THE OLYMPICS
FULL COMPETITION HIGHLIGHTS

This GOOD BOY ran onto the course during the Women’s Cross-Country Skiing Team Sprint event, crossing the finish line and being automatically recorded by OMEGA’s photofinish camera 😆

There can only be one