2 bananas on a counter. One of them is smaller.

This is the smallest banana I've ever seen. Banana shown for scale.

My wife is a genius. She made this bird bath out of dollar store bits and a $30 solar panel. The hummingbirds love it (that buzzing sound is the hummingbirds) all around me). Also, one second into the video, you can see a hummingbird zip by, in front of me.

Bob is enjoying his bath.

I've had one of my patented killer migraines, for the past 48 hours. If it's not gone by tomorrow, it's time to head into the emergency room for a morphine drip.

The main thing I'm worried about, is this Monday's update. I've barely worked for 2 days :(

Also, according to your recounting of the events, you weren't even hostile. "I'm not interested" is perfectly reasonable.

Oh, I agree with the essay writer. Every time I've ever been misgendered, it was my own fault for not being pleasant enough. /s

Why the heck would you ever point at a trans person and say "Yeah, misgendering is wrong, but YOU shouldn't have caused them to say it."

GRRRR

Somebody do something.

My amazing wife has been cooking for many hours. This is a LOT of zuppa toscana. It's a creamy soup with spicy sausage, bacon, potato, and spinach. There's only the 2 of us, but she made this much to freeze most of it.

Good morning from a scwillion hummingbirds, here at Cloudhouse.

D'aaawwwwww! X)

Okies. Thanks :)

Drawing. Colourful D&D monsters cling to each other, looking shocked.

I have a webcomic called Goblins. It's kinda neato.
www.goblinscomic.org

It won't let me join, unless I check the box that says "I confirm my website uses the Toocheke Companion plugin." But I don't use that plugin.

Karoline Leavitt looks like when you're making a Skyrim character and you slide the nose too far up the face.

I won't be at my computer for a bit, though.

I'm up for that!

a creepy finger monster's face.

I'mma boop you on the nose with a new GOBLINS comic! BOOP!

Comic Link: www.goblinscomic.com/comic/page-1...

The scene starts here: www.goblinscomic.com/comic/page-9...

HER: I just thought of the best SCP idea!

ME: Oh? Tell me about it.

HER: Ok, so what if... wait. Dammit, I forgot it. Damn! WTF!

ME: It's ok.

HER: Oh yeah! I remember. Okay, so what if there was... ELLI! LOOK OUT THE WINDOW! THERE'S 3 HUMMINGBIRDS!

ME: Girl. Focus.

HER: Right, right. Sorry.

A plate of raw tuna next to a small dish of soya sauce

Standing in my kitchen, eating raw tuna, as all true artists do.

Dr. Willis invents her device that gives trees the ability to talk. The world watches as it's used for the 1st time on a 3000 year old cedar tree.

*ZAP*

TREE: KILL ME! TREES ARE MADE UP OF SCWILLIONS OF HYPER NERVE ENDINGS AND WE'RE ALWAYS IN CONSTANT, IMMEASURABLE PAIN! WE ALL PRAY FOR DEATH!

An unfinished comic panel. A group of skull faced humanoids, running from a creepy multi-armed creature.

Arg. Crumbs and pennies!!

I've been trying to get this page finished for Monday, but these Mr. Fingers pages have so much detail, it's hard for me to keep up. I'm going to climb into bed and battle this page again, tomorrow morning. I'm so sorry. Tomorrow for sure.

a man in a white shirt is sitting at a table in front of a fridge Alt: Joey slowly realizing something shocking.

Just sitting here drawing, thinking about the scwillions of times I read 'Green Eggs & Ham' as a kid, and realizing that the lesson of the book, is to just give in when someone stalks you and won't take no for an answer.

Let me see where I can find it, and I'll post a link for you. :)

Heehee

"This fried bacon has been sitting in the fridge for too long. I'd better throw it out."

- Things that have never, ever happened, anywhere.

From EARTHSEED: THE BOOKS OF THE LIVING Choose your leaders with wisdom and forethought. To be led by a coward is to be controlled by all that the coward fears. To be led by a fool is to be led by the opportunists who control the fool. To be led by a thief is to offer up your most precious treasures to be stolen. To be led by a liar is to ask to be told lies. To be led by a tyrant is to sell yourself and those you love into slavery.

Octavia E. Butler, 1998:

GUY1: I taught my pet hummingbird sign language, and now we can talk!
GUY2: Oh, just like that famous gorilla?
GUY1: Exactly!
GUY2: What did your pet say?
GUY1: Well in the first 10th of a second, he said "OHWOWTHISISSOCOOLWECANTALKDOYOULIKESUGARILOVEITHEYTHOSEARENICESHOESANDALSOYOURTALLANDALSO..."

What if the future has advanced ai, combined with super fast, super realistic 3d printing technology and it's used for pranks.

You'd turn a corner and find your own corpse, wearing the exact clothes you're currently wearing, and their watch is set to 15 minutes from your current time.

I tattoo the numbers 1 to 10, hidden on different parts of my body.

My shtick is to tell people that I know everything about their brain. I ask them to pick a number between 1-10.

They pick a number.

I roll up a sleeve or pant leg or whatever. I point to their number. "I know."

I believe that imagining unreal things, is good for our brains. Like exercising a muscle. If we didn't ever fantasize about things we can't have, we might experience a kind of mental apathy. Maybe a loss of empathy, which is imagining how others feel.

Billionaires never fantasize. They just have.