i like to assign a numerical value to the orgasms i get from my sex toys . vibe rater , is what im saying

spinoff called "the glizzard of oz" where all the characters go on a magical journey to get a hotdog

labubu is the singular form of labia

Moet & Chandon Champagne Vending Machine | Zenith Supplies Buy Moet & Chandon Champagne Vending Machine Online Moet & Chandon Champagne Vending Machine Description of Moët & Chandon Champagne vending machine Moët & Chandon, one of the world's ...

i just had a really good idea but apparently it’s not a novel one

A computer for the shower

Sorry ma'am

I'll see your sabre rattling and raise you a jerk-off motion.

@hubbab382247.bsky.social You're weird dude

eating tonight’s dinner (egg sandwich) and thinking about tomorrow’s dinner (egg sandwich)

If my boyfriend called me "gal" on the skyline I would burn all his dick pics

Dog staring philosophically out at ocean

Yes, he knew he was a good boy.

But how good?

This is my daughter, Lottie. Short for axolotl

a nickel for my thoughts? holy shit, that’s a 400% pay increase. thank you!

literally a cartoon character

a photo of a very full figured blond woman in a pink cleavagy gown and boa running down porch steps captioned "me running tiddies first into the weekend and leaving this week in the dust"

logging on

Low-hanging fruit? Please don't talk about my boobs

Send me a dick pic, but just the hub where it connects

I made a late resolution to become Swedish this year (not move there just eat 35 lbs of candy)

I hope to find your package under my tree

Signpost with distance to London (600) on top, France (100) below it, and a pair of underpants below that.

Bravo, anonymous hero.

Do-over? The only do-over I want is me going back in time and I don't open the DM of your dick pic

I am thinking about resolving to be less helpful in 2026. Just be a real pain in the ass. Across the board

This could be us but you insist that we not be real bros

having a conjugal visit with a pan of leftover lasagna

I would love for someone else to ask me why I didn't answer their email or phone call. If I couldn't manage that, do you think I magically have better answers for you now?

Oh shit I forgot I had this account

I know I'm prettier when I smile. I just don't give a fuck.

Please know that if I really like you slash have a crush on you, there's a 99% chance I also hate you and think you make poor choices and say stupid things

Sucked is better than skipped

Works for productivity and also dicks