I put my footnotes in my socks where they belong

i’m a cowboy on a steel horse i ride, your honor

Dropped the hot; just a mess

I screamed into the abyss today, and it handed me breath mints.

I was just thinking that. I think we jinxed us all. 😬

Literally dropped off our wife’s car yesterday to get the snow tires removed.

setting myself up for success tomorrow by filling up the coffee maker tonight because goddamnit I like to pretend I have my shit together

*KA-CHUNK*

Ah, I do enjoy pressing the block button on a reply-guy who is being disingenuous. It's like popping bubble-wrap.

Oh, we’re still using milk? Then, yeah, I’ll pass. I thought he was pouring hot sauce in the bowl instead of milk. Which would be crazy, but I’d try it!

OH MY GOD I WAS RIGHT
www.nytimes.com/2026/04/14/o...

Spicy chocolate sounds good. I’d totally try it.

Albany, NY folks:

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The Plastic Detox

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😂

You know what it’s like when you have to suffer through the excessive grunting and shouting from a dude at the gym desperate to get attention for how much he’s lifting?

Well, I just had that experience coming from the bathroom stall next to me.

😆

I’m not proud of it but if Forrest Gump started talking to me on a bench I’d have left

You know what it’s like when you have to suffer through the excessive grunting and shouting from a dude at the gym desperate to get attention for how much he’s lifting?

Well, I just had that experience coming from the bathroom stall next to me.

Thanks for sharing!

David Bowie looking very ill at ease seated at a table with balloons and paper plates and a sign reading Happy Birthday.

How do you afford your rock and roll lifestyle?

Your brain explained: Why it's getting harder to pay attention If it feels harder to concentrate than it used to, it's not just you. Scientists say your brain is reacting exactly as it was designed to — but in a very different world.

Why it’s getting harder to pay #attention

www.abc.net.au/news/2026-04...

Fighting the brainrot: The importance of listening to albums in full… It’s no wonder so many of us feel anxious and fatigued by life; we live like everything is an emergency, and we are running out of time. So dust off that…

www.kerrang.com/fighting-the...

I feel like Blondie quickly ran out of things to rap about in Rapture.

Just remembered I said I’d go to the gym and suddenly I feel like I might be coming down with tuberculosis

Me announcing my presence on Bluesky

“Americans have long defended a simple principle: the government should not decide what we think, say, or read.” | Penguin Random House continues to take a strong stance on book bans: global.penguinrandomhouse.com/announcement...

as a non Christian I am wildly impressed by how well they predicted Trump in the Know Your Antichrist section of the Bible

I'm guessing the author got caught with alcohol in their work desk and said "It's for a story!"

Do BMWs not come with a turn signal?

You’ve disabled replies but there’s a typo in the post. What’s a person to do.

Justin Bieber is the Andy Kaufman of today I’m just not sure if it’s intentional.