Will this be the year that BB and DJT take a dirt nap?

The greatest Dragon Master ever! Now we'll all succumb to the Marovitch Effect

Anyone who voted Republican and is a proud Maga supporter needs to be pushed to the front of the line in Iran; this goes especially for those out-of-shape losers who keep posting vids of their beer guts and AR-15s online.

Classic! I wonder if they use the same technology from popcorn to make those safety vests for elderly people if they fall...

What flavor are you poppin?

Hegseth says we didn't start the war....after a collaborative bombing that killed dozens of school children...right.

"Shrimp Cocktail" sounds like a porn name

Any voice actors out there?

Join The Onion Don’t just read the news. Feel it. Be among the first to feel the news.

Fuck Jeff Bezos. Subscribe to The Onion.

membership.theonion.com

Remember how we had to say the Pledge of Allegiance in school? Remember the end?

"With liberty and justice for all."

Is it truly "for all?"

I don't remember pledging allegiance to a wannabe dictator that decides who deserves liberty and justice, do you?

I Pledge Allegiance to the truth, now

Who was it?

Trump can't walk in a straight line, there's no way he's running anywhere

I canceled mine yesterday. It's annoying you can't cancel in app, but if you can do it on a chrome tab on your phone.

Make sure let them know why too! They supported Trump's campaign and they refuse to take down the ICE ads

What the actual hell?

Does anyone else get lost as hell on Hollow Knight: Silksong? I've been roaming all over act 2 and idk where the hell to go

Thou shalt not refuse to swear in elected officials because you’re desperately trying to cover up sex crimes by billionaire pedophiles.

Billionaires sowing division
Vladimir aims with precision

I honestly thought Milania would have arsenic in his cabinet by now.

They've been threatening this forever, just do it already. Command them, God!

Meet my pal, Jerry D'Mato. He has started exploring the Food Bank and the surrounding areas of service.

"Escalator temporarily stairs...sorry for the convenience"

Hello, yes. I'd like to order a USA with a side of democracy...and for the love of god, if I find any fascism in it, I'll burn this place to the ground

Just made it to the citadel and fought some dancing guy. I also like to explore the maps. Apparently there are a ton of tools to unlock. I'm not even close

Hulu too

I finally snapped myself away from Twitter and Deactivated my account

Do we think he's dead?

Incredible and intellectual

In what context did you learn it? Was it Hogan related?

One of my favorite poems of his. I also love "how many how much"

Love you, Matt