We just find it weird Kieran

I’ll never forget watching The Wicker Man with my outer Hebridean mum. “I just don’t know where there got all that wicker from”

I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps rock climbers with their grasp
Of ropes, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
And closes with a subtle spring,
The humble and the trusty
Carabiner

It was horrible. Everyone in her office UK had friends or colleagues in the towers.

This is real

When the twin towers were hit my wife worked in portfolio management. No tv in office. Found out what was going on when clients phoned to find out how it would affect their shares. All before the second plane hit.

Headline writers crossing all their fingers that whatever Scott Mills did it was dark and satanic

It’s also Chinese year of the horse, if you’re looking for another selling point.

I seems at its best when it’s very British. A bit off and dark. The musical was great because of all the little character stuff. Loving it.

This just reminded me of my favourite two ronnies punchline from childhood involving lorry spillages. “ Police are combing the area” you can build backwards to the joke.

45 seconds with fouracres was the highlight for me. Enjoyed it all more than SNL though. #SNLUK

Dunno if I'm more squeamish about the release of further Epst3in files, or the release of UK SNL.

Oh I totally get it. Work is never free eh, it’s paid for by donations from the artists… always happy to explore although everything I think of comes back to “ but where will we get the money.” Maybe I’ll just retire to the veranda with my books.

Sleeping in my face apparently.

That’s something young artists try to do but maybe if more established/older artists did,might be interesting.The young are better at working for no cash,to make a difference. If a bunch of well kent faces started doing stuff for little reward,that in itself might start a convo.You’ve got my number.

WAWIN Full Vegan Chinese

Glasgow vegan pals, check this place out. Utterly amazing.

wawin.co.uk

Bloody hell. 76% and I felt like a god. A blind god, but never the less.

It which point I couldn’t clean anymore through the tears.

Drive yourself crazy.

73% then it really becomes nightmarish. If these were my own glasses, at this point I’d just buy new ones.

- The council…
- aye?
- Insurance job…
- zat right?
- Student flats…
- is it?
- Vape shops…
- ah blame Prometheus, masel

Union street fire: support Haus of Hair Last month, my wonderful hairdresser and friend Gemma left her job to fulfil her dream of starting her own salon with fellow stylist Aimee. 'Haus of Hair' opened last week. I visited on Friday and wa...

My hairdresser and friend opened her business last week. Tonight it burned to the ground. This is devastating.

I’ve set up a fundraiser. If you haven’t done anything for international women’s day yet, here’s a chance to support a women-run business in need: www.paypal.com/pools/c/9nhn...

just saw someone call Andrew Tate "Lawrence of Dry Labia" and spat my scotch out.

*current thoughts whilst trying to block out the fact that the apocalypse is drawing ever closer*

The kinkiest dinosaur was the Pegger-sore-arse.

Steinbeck: What did you think of my draft of 𝘖𝘧 𝘔𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘔𝘢𝘯?

Publisher: It needs more characters.

Steinbeck: I'll see what I can do.

Dr Oetker creator was in SS GERMANY: The founder of frozen pizza giant Dr Oetker was a Nazi who joined Hitler's SS, his son has revealed. Rudolf-August Oetker (pictured), who died in 2007, benefited from his close ties with Hitler, said 59-year-old August, the company's chairman.

What next? Bird's Eye Potato Waffen?

Cheerful looking dog with a telephone held to his ear, like he's having a lovely doggy phonecall

Roses are grey,
And violets are grey,
Hello, this is dog,
Please have a good day

Asking for an americano no milk almost kills me.

People often talk about double yolk eggs, but nobody ever brings up the difficult second albumen