gun in my mouth

lola i would give everything to hear you say i love you again even though ive been a disastrous grandkid please come back

i don't want to come back to streaming yet but i need to keep going or else i wont have the money i need to pay for things that keep me from self exploding fuck dang it lola i miss you so much i sound selfish but i wish you didnt have to pass the way you did i wish i still had time to be with you

putangina takot nako

grief is way too heavy on me but i need to stream and make money to pay bills and buy meds jesus fuck i cant rest too long and i dont want to remain focused on the loss because if i sit in it i would end up drowning in it and thats not great

i think that ever since i dipped, things improved a lot for me. holy shit i think i lost some core shit along the way, but like.. if we do not fit together anymore then that is fine. i will be fine without it.

okay so i recovered this account and it seems to be a lot healthier for me to cry and rant here hagfhahaha

current attempt is not working i hope whoever inconveniences me stubs their toe and the nail gets ripped off

sino ka di kita kilala bata ka ba

erm i forget ppl can see me

dw about it stranger

kura practice nonchalance why the fuck is your ass always CHALANTING

ganun pala sila....

man...im pulling away and doing my own thing bahala na

a man standing in front of a red brick wall ALT: a man standing in front of a red brick wall

FUCK DAMN I FEEL LIKE BC I DO NOT FEEL RELEVANT WHENEVER IM WITH YALL LIKE JESUS CHRIST I WILL GET DROWNED OUT

ugh i trust my gut ik when the jig is up and it is UP IN THE AIR

feeling like an absolute CLOWN even though i know yall see what i see but ogei sana nalang di lumala

i wish every ch4t9pt supremacist a horrible 2025. you're not a writer if your only experience is jamming prompts into a generator and call it your best literary work. shame on you if you call that something you can charge money for as well jfc 🖕🏻

fuck numbers im swinging my monstrous cock at the bitch that made numbers and math FUCK YOU

if anything i think ive gotten a little better at talking to people but i didnt know that somewhere along the road the numbers would start to hurt and make you feel bad nonetheless numbers were created with someone's imagination as an attempt to make things make sense but im defo more real or whatev

ofc i cant quit rn bc the thing that keeps me going is just the idea of putting out all my passion projects and making more friends along the way bc i did start doing this to combat my anxiety and start talking to people with out my knees buckling or whatever

i miss streaming but i feel stupid when im live and im 3 minutes in and nobody has said anything in chat or redeemed first i begin wondering if i should even be out there HAHAHAHA

like yeah she was my kamioshi at some point but lord god sumn happened and now im crying over a man WHAT WENT WRONG MISS KYUU KURARIN VT

i sob over the fact that i do not have a flayon nui in my hands my heart is BROKEN because i was there for its release but did not have the funds at the time ( i was spending on my own assets and millie parfait)

fuck it i'm turning this into my spot to yap about my problems and that one red vtuber i think about daily 🪫

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cat in box

can we make my cat the most liked photo on bluesky

Bernice ❤️ Started playing ZZZ again just cuz of her.