Oop. There it is. Looks like the old kettle is running a bit fast today.

<checks watch>
About time Chelsea sacked a manager innit? 🤔

POST MATCH Chris Agutter Sutton United 1 Altrincham 2 NL 18/04/26 YouTube video by Sutton United FCtv

Massive clear out coming a week tomorrow going by this and Tuesday's missive... youtu.be/qLXVkS07eMU?... #suttonunited

No, but we can understand how it could seem this way. 🤔

They're not that daft. Go on sale 20th. And we wish them all the luck with that. 😂

1-2 FT. Did we expect anything else from this bunch of absolute losers?

a man in a suit and tie is talking to a woman in a blue jacket . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is talking to a woman in a blue jacket .

Minute left. FK wide, one last chance to load the box, see if we can....oh ffs he's overhit it straight out of play.

8mins added. Thanks to some mass shithousing by Alty. Yeah, thanks lads. 🙄

The bed has been shat, we repeat THE BED HAS BEEN SHAT! Weak down our right, low ax, bloke in ahead of his marker poke in. 1-2. 🙄

<ade edmondson gif>
There's been another fuck up.

1-1. We give away a soft free kick, bloke whips it low through through the wall and inside nr post. Siiiigh.

1-0 HT. End of season fare.

3 mins added. Yawn.

Ogbonna in the box, falls over, keeps ball, back up, beats 2 more, scuffs shot, just deflected wide of near post.

We're doing a win! 😳 Cross in, poor header defender and Francis hooks it straight back on target with the keeps stranded! 1-0!

It's sunny at least.

Photos from @suttonunitedwomen.bsky.social's 2-0 win against Dartford in the Combined Counties League Cup:

www.flickr.com/photos/paull...

Photos not to be used without permission.
#SuttonUnited

2-0: Emma Spear pulls the ball back for Millie Cutler to find the bottom corner and double @suttonunitedwomen.bsky.social's advantage over Dartford:

1-0: Ella Meehan's free-kick from inside the @suttonunitedwomen.bsky.social half bounces into the Dartford box and somehow the ball ends up wrong footing the 'keeper to give the U's the lead:

What better way to rubber stamp another lifeless 0-3 home defeat to bang average oppo than finishing with 8 men and everyone else on a card? 😆

In other news, we could sew up the NL fair play 'title' at the weekend. Couple of divvy brainless reds should give us a nice advantage going into the final day. What?

POST MATCH Chris Agutter Farnham Town 0 (4) Sutton United 0 (2) SSC 15/04/26 YouTube video by Sutton United FCtv

At least it was honest.🤷‍♂️ #suttonunited

a man covering his nose with his hand while talking into a microphone in front of a wall with barclays advertisements ALT: a man covering his nose with his hand while talking into a microphone in front of a wall with barclays advertisements

Well, that was painfully fucking predictable...

🚨 LIVE CUP SEMI-FINAL 🚨 Farnham Town vs Sutton United - 14/04/2026 - 7:45PM KO YouTube video by Farnham Town FC

Seems tonight's big cup clash is live on Youtube. www.youtube.com/live/ryDKZ1F... #suttonunited

Same nutter who signed off all the poundshop Manhattan stuff round there most likely. 😂

Like fuck have we gone. Still in therapy from the FA Cup tie down there earlier this season.
<shudders>

Surrey Cup Semi at Farnham tonight. Spare a thought for the flat capped wonder as the not so mighty U's hunt pot number 16 in the competition. #jesuisdukey

Would rather watch the weather forecast than go to Borehamwood. 😐

Bit short notice. Will the Surrey Senior do? Got a semi final tomorrow night...

Photos from Sutton United's 3-0 loss away at Carlisle:

www.flickr.com/photos/paull...

Photos not to be used without permission.