Hey everybody! I am taking the helm of this classic American institution with @theonion.com and want to know what you fine folks would like to see from us.

This has the potential to be *so* fucking good, holy shit.

They play Mr Jones by idontevenknowwho in season 2 and hearing an actual song, even one I have as little interest in as Mr Jones, genuinely made me pump my fist. I was excited to hear Mr Jones because it *wasn't* a dogshit "modern" reimagining.

It's particularly noticeable whenever they play an actual original song for diegetic reasons, because they're always infinitely better for the scene, actually sound like someone who enjoys music made them and they're *also* not songs I'm overly fond of.

They try to sorta shoehorn an in-universe reason for them in season 1, except that would only really rationalise playing the actual songs, they're on-the-nose "title reflects plot" garbage puns and they're just bad music. The Elvis ones are egregiously unflattering and I hate Elvis as is.

It might be an attempt at some meta "this is the classics reimagined after the apocalypse" sorta thing except nothing else in the show reflects the style so it's *just* shit covers for the sake of shit covers. Every time one starts I groan, worst soundtrack I've heard on a show in decades.

Paradise is an enjoyable show but whoever chose to put utterly dogshit covers of old songs into every nook and cranny needs to be fired or retrained or something. They are, to a tee, utterly *dismal* reimaginings, like, every one of them is astonishingly shit and it's not like I like the originals.

Another year older, not feeling wiser, not particularly happy, I hope things change, I hope I work out how to change them. Not the worst year of my life, but it doesn't feel as distant as I'd like, just gotta keep going, once more round the sun.

Avril 14th YouTube video by Aphex Twin - Topic

It's been an annual tradition for as long as I can remember, as midnight strikes at the start of April 14th I reflect on the last year and listen to an all-time classic by Aphex Twin. Here's to making the next year better than the last! youtu.be/uxTdTaNIUxo

Feel my already incredibly constrained world getting so much smaller and I dunno I'm just tired of trying, I get it, I'm beat already. What's the point.

Fucks sake man, my static disbanded cause someones schedule changed, I swear I'm cursed. Maybe I finally uninstall and let it go, I'm too shit at meeting people and playing with randoms spikes my anxiety too much to be sustainable, feels pretty rotten.

A screenshot from the FFXIV special site for patch 7.5, text says New Dungeon - The Clyteum

I'm never gunna be able to find this dungeon, guess my MSQ journey ends here... #ffxiv

Not beating the "bluesky is a pit of scolds and non-joke-getters" allegations with this one superchief.

I'm gunna get blocked I guess, but "I make my living from words" is genuinely a hilarious bio to read in the context of not understanding this, so thank you for that. It's a strange thing that was posted on Easter, it is Easter, it's remembering the strange thing because it's relevant to the day.

It's Easter...the post in question was made on Easter...it's not particularly hard to follow the logic here, surely?

I didn't really play StS1, so I'm not the best at recognising every archetype on each class, but every now and then I put a run together where I figure a new strat out and it feels so good. Had a run yesterday where even as the final boss died I wasn't entirely sure how I'd managed it. Great fun.

The world is full of good people, kind people, caring people, and our system of governance almost entirely precludes them from having any real say 'cause you almost have to be a gutless, two-faced cunt to survive the machine trying to spit you out. Rotten to the core.

Congratulations, you stood for fuck all, history will forget you, or remember you as a useful idiot at best, and at worst you'll be remembered for the complicity you're desperately trying to hide.

So terrified of speaking out. Cowering, wimpering, spineless cowards the lot of them.

Stand up for the disenfranchised, the oppressed, the people suffering the most in society, it's not just the right thing to do it's *good fucking politics*. "Career" politicians are a fucking scourge on democracy, sooner burn the ladder with themselves on it than help others climb.

Unless the issue is trans rights. In which case it *is* a Litmus test and the "correct" answer is to spew vitriol disguised as reason.
Just *always* on the wrong side of things, and it fucks me off cause it's the same in the UK, how is this an endemic pitfall we keep falling into?

Depictions of a mechanic from the third boss of Another Merchants Tale in FFXIV drawn in excel

Four FFXIV characters stand victorious at the end of the dungeon, a male Roegadyn Ninja pondering an egg, a female Viera Paladin, female Au'Ra Red Mage and male Viera Sage

Cleared Another Merchant's Tale blind with some pals, developed a new method of making raidplans in Excel (my sweet, sweet Excel), turned out most of our solutions were close to the PF solutions, few hitches along the way but good fun, not sure I'd want to do everything blind but it's a fun treat!

HA'WAYYYYYYY! YA BEAUTIES!

For maybe 3 years now my options, when it came to dressing my lower half, has been either of two pairs of identical (apart from colour) shorts. Just found a third pair under a pile of blankets. That's a 50% wardrobe buff. What a time to be alive!

This is shaping up to be my favourite special so far, the longer the show goes on the richer it gets and the better they get at just landing every single bit, so so good.

Greggs general appearance and his refusal to remove his thumbs from the pull-tabs on his wings is genuinely sending me to the stratosphere. The occasional flap of a wing as he bumbles about is gold, inject it into my veins.

Over the last two weeks I've watched one On Cinema Oscar special a day, ready to watch tonights as soon as its available as a VoD tomorrow. It's been a truly wild ride, insane getting annual snapshots of the overarching plot/characters. It's Christmas in Tinsel Town folks, it's MOVIE TIME!

The screen fell cause I waS TRYING TO GET THE **BIRDS OUT**

That one doing the rounds at the minute that says "you're listening to a podcast so clearly people like podcasts, you want to reach people right?" is particularly stupid.