i actually do know where the examples are. but im not going to tell him unless he changes his tone.

I got an email about Goose playing near me soon after I learned about the band Geese and I thought oh they spelled it wrong. Easy mistake to make. Good thing I know better.

I have been a paying subscriber since the first episode. I don't know how to hear the ad free episodes and I will never learn.

An important part of the YKS experience is noticing that Jesse is doing his ad read voice but not being able to tell what the product is and actually becoming quite anxious as he starts another side riff. It's quince or nordvpn! Just say which one!

a screenshot of the "New Bestsellers" list from Substack, with Andrew Tate in the #1 position

Hey, look at Substack promoting Andrew Tate as the #1 new bestseller. The company's amoral leadership & backers will platform anyone, even ludicrously toxic rapists & human traffickers.

That podcast I've been saying is coming on all of those podcasts I've been guesting on is here. It's here!

photoshop of a good trailcams Bluesky post including a “trailcam” pic of Donald Trump looking especially like a cryptid

When I tell my kids it's bedtime after a week off from school

Saw an ad for M&Ms today and honestly....if you don't know about M&Ms by now you are dumb as fuck

Just saw my friend Mario, you might know him. First name Super, last name Brothers Galaxy Movie.

The NudeBalleur has posted that he is "on the move".....authorities say to stay alert.

Well this is embarrassing- I've been calling him "Mop Dan." I thought it was about his haircut!

Watch Big Mistakes | Netflix Official Site Blackmailed into working for some very dangerous people, two deeply incapable siblings become the most disorganized duo in organized crime.

I can finally talk about something I got to do: I was the organized crime consultant (AKA "Mob Dan") in the writers room for Dan Levy's very funny new show "Big Mistakes" on Netflix, which you can now watch! Go watch it! I need to do this job for life, it's too fun! www.netflix.com/title/81734605

bitch im Pregnatius J Reilly

Wow what an embarrassing Freudian slip that I accidentally said penis twice while thinking about this anthropomorphic dogs huge cock

Top text: I need to get home

Image: a "Big Dogs" style dog gripping his enormous penis penis in the style of the "Big Johnson" shirt guy

Bottom text: And wag off

Let the bombs fall. I've painted my Mona Lisa.

If nuclear war happens someone will still be asking me to do something pointless at work “by EOD”

Yeah I fucked w those

Last week I was 80% sure I saw Earthquakes player Benji Kikanovic at Costco. But after seeing him playing tonight I am up to 99%. He did not have a cart as he left; I believe he was returning something.

MOM: Can he hear us?

DOCTOR: You have to understand, these are temperatures that can cook a tender pork chop. His brain is essentially in a sous vide. It won't be long now.

ME: (149° fever) Attie, build me a feed of experimental motion graphics, slam poetry, and funky jazz fusions.

MOM: Oh god.

I'm on the train

A comment on Github from Axios maintainer Jason Saayman that, in part, reads: "they tailored this process specifically to me by doing the following: they reached out masquerading as the founder of a company they had cloned the companys founders likeness as well as the company itself. they then invited me to a real slack workspace. this workspace was branded to the companies ci and named in a plausible manner. the slack was thought out very well, they had channels where they were sharing linked-in posts, the linked in posts i presume just went to the real companys account but it was super convincing etc. they even had what i presume were fake profiles of the team of the company but also number of other oss maintainers."

pretty notable post-mortem from the Axios maintainer who says hackers tricked him via a bespoke Slack channel, fake microsoft team calls and initial communications that imitated the founder of a legit company

I've been on the waitlist at Bimbo Sissy Online Academy forever but it looks like this week my luck has changed...

I think they should call it Turtles Having Sex. At least they will if they want my $$$

old ass...

Branson writes good books. And I'm not saying that to be nice. In fact I'll say something mean which is a lot of "writers" suck at writing. But not Branson.

I got a bag of the Doritos NKD with no artificial stuff and my kid won't eat them. She says without all the other stuff the seasoning is just salt. And damn if that ain't the truth.

a prismatic creature surrounded by a sparse scattering of flowers

March 2026 PHYSICAL WORLD print for my $10 patreon subscribers, going in the mail asap!

Join here: www.patreon.com/cw/emosludge

If you join before midnight tonight, I'll send you one of these.

Every neighborhood has that one demented old child molester in a falling apart house. Just don't go trick or treating there and it's not a big deal

Cobie Smulders is the most beautiful a woman can be with the name of a highly touted receiver from Texas A&M.