A derpy looking girl with pigtails awkwardly running while holding on to three cat-shaped balloons.

Cat Balloons!

Bruised Avocado Sticker - Christopher Horn's Ko-fi Shop Though he is showing major damage, don't count this boxing avocado half out! Gloves still held high, he's sure to at least go the distance. 2.4" x 3....

That's why they look that way sometimes.

This and more at: ko-fi.com/platypusranch

Or Dennis DeYoung.

A pug with strabismus surfing. He is wearing a small wooden statue he found at a burial site as a necklace.

This isn't going to end well.

In the way that happy-go-lucky old men whistle while shopping, I want to learn how to do that Mongolian overtone throat singing and really shake things up at the grocery store.

Headline: Stay Safe Image: a backlit tornado; the landscape is dark. Caption: Why Nighttime Tornadoes Are More Dangerous Than You Think

It's because they can't see where they are going and are thus more likely to bump into stuff.

A black and white line art drawing of a hammerhead shark wearing a little sailor's cap and neckerchief in a tiny rowboat.

Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily; life is but a dream.

Suzan Pitt's "Asparagus"!

Just until the street lights come on.

A 'Dinosaur Smarties' Easter egg.

Erm, they're called palaeontologists, actually.

A man with blood streaming from his mouth piloting a shopping cart. In the cart are several cans of peaches and a child with a revolver. The ground is parched; the horizon is red. Text reads "The Road".

Only if you let it bring you down!

Metalhead Sticker - Christopher Horn's Ko-fi Shop A hand with legs wearing tight black jeans, studded belt, and white high-top sneakers contorts into the gesture popularized by Ronnie James Dio. 2.38...

This and more at: ko-fi.com/platypusranch

I am very excited by the rumors of Endless Shrimp™ returning to Red Lobster.

Mirepoix Buddies Sticker - Christopher Horn's Ko-fi Shop Carrot, Onion, and Celery unite! Through the power of friendship, they create a base flavor for a wide variety of dishes. 3.5" x 3.27" laminated viny...

Carrot, Onion, and Celery unite! Through the power of friendship, they create a base flavor for a wide variety of dishes.

This and more at: ko-fi.com/platypusranch

Pink Fairies "Do It!" YouTube video by SoulStylistJukeBox

Don't think about it.

Baaaphomet Sticker - Christopher Horn's Ko-fi Shop As above, so below! A fluffy sheep filling in for the Sabbatic Goat. 3.5" x 3.23" laminated vinyl sticker.

As above, so below! The concept of duality, in convenient sticker form.

This and more at: ko-fi.com/platypusranch

Deviled Eggula Sticker - Christopher Horn's Ko-fi Shop A devil figure throwing "the horns" while driving a deviled egg hotrod. 3.25" x 3.17" laminated vinyl sticker.

Deviled Egg season is upon us! (It's always deviled egg season).

This and more at: ko-fi.com/platypusranch

I'm enjoying the bureaucracy.

The cartoonishly bulgy eyes and smiley mouth of Shin Godzilla's lungfish stage. It's gills look like big, fat cheeks and jowls.

I finally got around to starting "Shin Godzilla" (2016). I'll finish it up tomorrow.

Boy, those first few evolutions look real fuckin' goofy.

That really gimbals my engines.

Or is he reciting Ying Yang Twins' "Wait"?

You have no faith in my ability to develop the leathery hide of a 1970s long-haul truck driver.

I'm trying to decide if I should finally start using sunscreen this summer or go all-in and try to look like a boat guy.

If anyone can bring the rattail back, it's you. I have faith.

Sea, air, and land! Having dominion over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth, man.

"Say it with your whole chest."

I really enjoyed season 3 of Primal. Fantastic stuff.

Mean Mugging Sticker - Christopher Horn's Ko-fi Shop An anthropomorphic coffee cup with a menacing expression. 2.54" x 3"

This and more at: ko-fi.com/platypusranch

New & Improved! Tussy® Cream Deodorant (Original Fresh Spice, ph Balanced).

You can still get some of that sweet Tussy Cream.