It has been like a year since I posted anything on any platform. have I been cleansed? have I lost the poster’s instinct?

(To Family guy theme) it seems today that all you see is violence in movies and shreks on tv

… No I still got it

Come Mr Family Guy Tally Me Banana

who is thinking about the Roman Empire daily what a loser

*thinks about Robert shaws monologue from jaws for the third time that morning*

TFW that ding donged boat just won’t go up that hill

Spoons, Wednesday 1st November 8pm Hysteria Comedy

I'll be hosting Ireland's first all-disability lineup Spoons starting this Wednesday in Sin É!
www.eventbrite.ie/e/spoons-dis...

One thing I miss off twitter is sports teams I follow no super easy way to do that anymore

Swear to god there’s an immediate tension that goes away when you don’t have to look at twitter crumble- not that I use this all that much but just deleting account and moving on is great

Screenshot from Godzilla game Citizen saying “Go ahead and destroy the financial district Godzilla. Make the people happy”

I checked back in and it was there but don’t think I was notified

I got mine- it’s super janky it required me to log into twitter dot com in the browser of the x app it may have broken in the past few weeks

everyone’s talking about lotto plus you gotta get on that lidl plus- that’s where the real winnings are

rguby

The implied social contract between you and a cat is they get to live in your house and be gross, and you get to bother them a little

yer da wears his fitbit in the shower

A “Gun Egg” device for frying an egg into the shape of a cowboy gun yee haw

Gun egg

A “Gun Egg” device for frying an egg into the shape of a cowboy gun yee haw

Gun egg

Pumpkin hoop

About to get thrown out of here for obvious reasons

nphet been awfully quiet I think they’re plotting something

there’s a directors cut of Big where Tom Hanks learns to swear like and adult and brings that back to his childhood life and also he smokes

bobby "boris" pickett nailed it when he described the monster mash as a "graveyard smash." anyone who was there will tell you, that's exactly what it was. only none of us knew how to put that feeling into words. bobby changed all that. he changed it forever

Photo of Musk in a business suit, surrounded by seriously looking people. Headline: EXCLUSIVE Elon Musk is arrested for sexually assaulting of cattle at his friend's ranch. Link to cnbc.com

So Musk removed news headlines from Twitter across all devices, Web and mobile. Ok then.

hey stand ups, maybe don’t do gags about how someone looks like they have been to prison and they look rough where the punchline is just that they have been to prison

Lt. Columbo standing in a doorway with a handful of loose papers, about to ask a question

POV: You Are Fucked

a YouTube thumbnail of a man holding up a box of vintage cigarettes and smoking in the woods. Video is titled “Smoking Unopened Original 58 year old cigarettes (pre-1965) video is 38 mins 48 seconds long

dudes *coughing uncontrollably* rock

horseshoe theory: if you have been kicked in the head by a horse you become a centrist

I’m actually sad that lough neagh (big lake) is very sick

those book of kells tourists have had it too good for too long about time someone took them down a peg, how do we make them suffer more? what do you mean this a housing protest?

John Wilson: wait, what do you mean by that?

Some guy who invited him into his house to show him his bottle cap collection: So yeah anyway, in 1973 I ate my family dog