omg we used to get "stromae breaks" in my high school French class where the teacher would blast his music and let us get our energy out

I feel like it is simultaneously March and May. April does not exist

didn't realize how bad my seasonal depression was until it got warm again. The sun is shining. I can wear shorts again. The frat guys across the street are blasting here comes the sun in their yard. The world is healing

love this for you

spoon size is dependent on bowl size for me

He looks like Steven, the betta fish I had when I was 9

y'all I finally found an actual map of the trails by my apartment. No more aimless wandering through the woods!!

but also I know for a fact this map is missing at least 1 trail so idk how much I should trust it.

Happy April fools ig

my gf's fortune cookie

This is my dad and also my son

Rule 1 of phansky is commit to the bit. Rule 2 is like Dan and Phil. If my bloomf is posting about piss and feet, then I will post about piss and feet 🫡

A student just accidentally called me mom, tried to correct himself and called me dad, and then finally remembered my name 💀

Yesterday, I was listening to a kid muttering to himself in the hallway. He said "maybe it's best to accept my fate instead of running from it"

I'm like 90% sure he's a 3rd grader. What is this child's fate and why was he running from it????

I love being in a relationship where I blurt out "our waiter's really hot" while she simultaneously says "the waiter gives me gender envy" 😂

Just now realizing I exposed how fucking sketchy my balcony is. One day I fear the whole thing is gonna come crashing down

BALLOON

name suggestions for balcony raccoon plz

fan autocorrected to phan in like a normal text conversation I need to get off the internet

Forgot to mention this on here. Mickey Mouse at Disney world knew who Dan and Phil are. I wore my phantasy land shirt and he flipped out. It was great

let's take a moment to appreciate the ring

If I had a nickel for every time a parent was somehow unaware of the fact their kid is in a special education class, I'd have 2 nickels. HOW DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING

No you need to include every single Dan and Phil clip in existence

I've never tried this but I feel like I need to now

I fawn, then fight, then flee. Pretty much always in that order

I miss the papillon one sm 😭

I have considered getting these for YEARS but I don't have the balls

I don't need anything, but the urge to go thrifting today is strong

Only a few more weeks until I get to wear my phantasy land shirt in fantasy land

dan howell sitting on a chair, wearing a fake chest body suit and a pair of colorful shorts. he's looking into the camera with a straight face. the room he's in is dark but a small light is lighting up his upper body.

there's a man in the room