Yeah

if it looks like science when you smoke weed, then it’s healthy and won’t scare you

smoking loud is when you hit the bong too hard and the bubbles make a lot of noise (rude)

(Greek neopagan guidance counselor after you’re caught jerking it at the library computer) you know who else got caught up in a thirst trap?

on my Sisyphus shit (happy to dig up the fine brown plastic mesh sod backing)

a curious child who expresses wonder using crass language must be disciplined for his incivility

some weeds try to fool you by resembling beautiful flowers

digging a hole in my backyard until I reach God

Scabble, it’s like Scrabble but you have to pick and use your own scabs

I like messiahs who weren’t crucified

Jesus with cauliflower ears

degenerated posters’ site

one day the Chinese will harness the power of the suburban American lawn tender and put it to good use

putting a pizza saver tripod down my pants to keep doo doo off my shorts

does the moon have goods and services?

the next president should be Chinese

Tuesday will be Powerful Gust Day, and Bitter Cold Day, all wrapped up in one, for the traveler. There will be nothing like it!!! Take off the Fuckin’ Cloak, you crazy bastard, or you’ll be living in Hell - JUST WATCH! Praise be to Hermes. THE NORTH WIND

resist the urge to romanticize the Tsar's yearly Easter gift to his wife, for what Fabergé truly encapsulated was the decadence that foretold the Empire's downfall

every Monday after a full moon should be a holiday

birdhouse that doxxes you

if it looks like science when you smoke weed, then it’s healthy and won’t scare you

human spine is proof enough that there’s no god

Through a Glass Darkly but it’s an Interrotron documentary about Hegseth’s tenure at DoD in which he just drinks and yells and cries the whole time

the days are running out of hours

breaking the day's legs and implanting metal rods to make it a few minutes longer

food has to have a little bit of poison in it

cigarette butts in the mud

burning down the forest for a rock that lies to me

there are people in your phone, but computer is not a person