The Max Scherzer one is what broke me

Getting a pair with quotes from books prohibited by the administration and calling it my Banned Wagon.

A digital illustration featuring pokemon. A leafeon and 3 eevees are crossing a log bridge. Behind them is a waterfall, some cliffs and a moon. In the foreground are big leafy plants.

Leafeon and her eevees🌿

My takeaway from Pope Day is that people around here are REALLY hungry for things to jaw about that don’t feel like the end of the world.

Your Pope name is: Last thing you ate + number of letters in your first name.

Which makes me Pope Biscotti VI

A sketchy illustration of a raccoon walking on its hind legs holding a sign that says “become ungovernable”. The image is very high contrast in reds, blacks and whites with small yellow highlights.

Become ungovernable.
#resist

Getting really invested in the conclave with the same energy as getting really invested in a particular sport for 2 weeks every Olympics

A Chicago Pope implies the existence of an MLA Pope and APA Pope

Digital illustration of the Pokemon eevee. They are sleeping on a desk next to a sunlit window. On the desk is a walkman along with some cassettes, headphones and a cup of coffee. They are surrounded by various houseplants.

A Sleeping Eevee ☕ 🌿

going to judgily describe everything everyone does for the next couple of weeks as "popeless behaviour"

Ralph Fiennes as dean of cardinals in Conclave, wearing a red and gold robe, looking stressed out because he has a crisis of faith but also has to choose a new Pope.

girls, we are about to be sequestered

autistic people not having to pay taxes is news to me. i want those back

A pair of human hands depositing a sleeping, stripy cat atop a flat platform that is being raised on a bellows-like extender, emerging from the top of a wide, low, rounded robot with four small wheels and a happy face. Text in the bottom right corner reads, "suggested by @MargoJMilne".

242) Lapbot. When a cat falls asleep on you and you can't move to restore circulation to your legs without risking a sudden and startling claw-filled awakening, Lapbot will smoothly relieve you of your burden. #SmallRobotsRemastered

1. Trans women are women
2. Fuck JK Rowling forever

I would like to say that I have never felt that trans women's rights in any way reduce my rights as a cis gendered woman.

I don't remember the last time I was this emotionally invested

i keep thinking about this

A cluster of owls of various shapes, hues and species sat in a tree with only the yellows of their eyes standing out against the blue hues of the night

A Parliament of Owls - Night Version ✨

sign posted at arby’s drive thru window in allentown, pa (steve photo): attention loyal arby’s guests. they are building a dunkin donuts next door! exciting times!! management

not all is bad in this world

Depressingly and sureally accurate

Screenshot of a Tumblr post by user sergeifyodorov. "Like, you'd think teams would be able to do something about ovi standing at the spot at this point. It's been 19 years and he's as gray as a wolf. That old man's hips gave out 3 years ago and he's still gonna put up 30, half of which are gonna be from the top of the circle on the power play. Top of the circle power play goal from Ovechkin. Sun rose in the east today i'm guessing? Oh, and it's gonna set in the west, too, I bet. Entire hockey players have been born trained and drafted in that time and we still don't know what to do about that fuckass yellow skatelaces refrigerator-sized piece of dubiously sourced Russian beef just standing in his little spot with his little stick in the air. But that's just how it be on this bitch of an earth."

This Tumblr post is from last year but remains spot on

Is she… you know *mimes swinging a hockey stick*

Literally got tipsy with a bunch of my friends tonight and got talking about how much I love sports and how gay coded that can be 😂

This is my culture

Not for nothing, but you could run a game of D&D via filibuster.

"Will the Senator yield for a question?"

"I yield for a question without yielding the floor."

"Can I shove the gargoyle?"

"Roll for strength."

"9".

*17 minute description of the gargoyle not moving after being shoved*

every MLB opening day I like to reflect on some of the lessons baseball teaches us about life, like how it's a miserable grinding slog that almost always ends in meaningless failure, and even your attempt to endeavor it is something most people will never have the time or inclination to care about

It’s Mini Eggs season. Legally, you can eat as many as you want and they can’t even stop you.

A radical skeleton telling you "Just start. You don't need permission. Art, craft, 2nd book, cake, writing, that show, any new skill, making friends. If it sucks, ask for help. The time will pass anyway"