°–°

me: "am depressed"

the irritating comical relief cat barges in and goes "NOT TODAY" and spills his meows all over

i would forgive myself if it wasn't a repeated offence. i don't learn and i don't grow. i don't know how.

but this feels evitable. it is for many people and yet not for me.

i hate that I've been raised into this monster and i have to fix it i never asked for this

feeling like I'm never gonna be able not to hurt people. I'm doomed to because I don't even fight it.

I'm so desperate I've started "allowing" her to pee everywhere but the couch like I don't want to fight or get mad or scare her anymore...
but please girl...the couch...

got frustrated and scolded pepper again and now i feel terrible...I'm just so tired of pee everywhere........so tired.....
she gets the concept of a litterbox but when comes time to pee she does it everywhere but.........
what am I doing wrong...

[insert clip]

i need
to stop
thinking
about
it
it's so
stupid

obsessing* lol

onsessing over a goofy thing! don't know how to make it stop! it's so goofy! pls make it stop!

give roomf back!!!

yknow when someone you don't really know but kinda feel like you know enters the room you and your friends are in

that is one WEIRD feeling

I just said "WHO IS THAT" out loud and scared the cats sorry babies there are voices in my head and they have a face i don't recognise

felt

I'm even more shy

I didit

maybe if I finally went and peed, the executive function would function because I'm not overstimulated by the PEE IN MY BLADDER

you are so different from them and you are so much more than their flaws you think you've inherited and are subconsciously nurturing.

again, that's people's problem until they bring it up with you. in any case, just because you feel that way (seeing them in yourself) it doesn't mean it's true, it just means you've been conditioned to think so because you know their flaws too much

ily, aiden
and whatever vibe you think is off, I don't feel it. you are not the weirdo your parents were/are, you are your own type of weirdo and it's the positive kind

I'm not trying to be harsh but also I kind of am WAKE UP BESTIE

you think you're different so bad /lh /hj

if it were only built by our upbringing, then I am mad doomed and I'll hurt the people around me until the day I die. and as much as sometimes it's easy for me to think so, I KNOW I'm wrong. BECAUSE I am not my parents.

your thinking is extremely flawed and I sure hope that someday you'll be able to see it. our character isn't solely built by our upbringing! it's created by everything around us!!!

you can most definitely shake off their behaviours it's what breaking a cycle is about and it's what growth is about. what you can't do is control people's biases and assumptions. you can only prove them wrong!!

but but but...thats a them problem!!!!! you are not "just them" you are YOU and it's people's problem if they assume otherwise!!!!! + not everyone thinks that!!

wrong wrong wrong you are your own person no matter your upbringing and you have a lifetime to figure that out and realise that
people feel weird around you because they SUCK. the real ones don't feel weird.