a twelve inch muffaletta sandwich

sandwich report: half a muffaletta from Mr Ed's Po Boy

i'll check in at midnight

the concept of French Dilbert. he doesn't work and his dog is fucking Mistressbert

no you didn't

like a dad in a 1950s sitcom. dog fetches your slipper and your nutsack peas

I really don't think I should have to verify that I am human to look at the Cheesecake Factory menu online. Dogs and robots should be able to look at 57 types of cheesecakes too.

more or less, yes. i've had to explain time value theory of teeth

8 year old has been getting into elaborate collateral swaps and tranching of lost teeth to get more money from the tooth fairy. this is a recession indicator

where's the lie

forgot that Police Story ends with Jackie Chan chest kicking an elderly man through a glass display case

clavicular roams asu like a ronin, his fame guaranteeing that at every crossroads a foid or moid will await to challenge him to mog

caves of qud

shit. fuck. I accidentally listened to Geese

that's not a cantrip that's a disintegrating ray

An absolutely deranged bathroom design with a full flight of stairs leading to a single stall with two toilets with safety rails on either side and a second balcony rail for a detached set of urinals with two mysterious doors. It’s unclear how you’d reach them but it looks like an Easter egg in a Tony Hawk game.

Boneless into kickflip to grind the balcony rail, transfer to right handrail and do a handstand special on the toilet, sticker plant to the left rail doing a grind special to maintain momentum upwards, sticker plant through the piss balcony and grind the urinal bank for a quick million point combo

a screenshot of a man wearing an all black morph suit and mask, lightly cupping his genitals, with the caption "After a slightly overweight person tries a rugged jacket"

you've been visited by 𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓗𝓸𝓶𝓸𝓷𝓬𝓾𝓵𝓾𝓼

*slide whistle sound effect*

what did you do to your phone josh

gentle parenting my mother

cliche ass cat is literally playing with a ball of yarn right now. tell him to get new material

Reuben Flagg describes "tromplography," the use of computer generated images to replace an actor

American Flagg says NO to AI generated imagery

used to think it was tufted on the end, but now I don't know. maybe he doesn't need one

do you think the grinch has a penis

Possibly AI generated pair of pants that (intentionally?) look like the bottom half of a Grinch bodybuilder. Caption says “Men’s Christmas Clothings are on sale”

Every Who down in Whoville skipped leg day a lot. But the Grinch, who had quads like a horse, did not

ah, finally, a highway patrol car is weaving slowly across all five lanes. that will fix it

nobody ever talks about the mole people these days

Permanent magnets decay at a very slow rate if kept cool and dry, like cheese

Wow

you think John Wick ever walks into a room and there are guns covering every wall and big plate glass cases and he just knows he's gonna have to do soooo much work in a few minutes

may I recommend the One Battle After Another soundtrack for drowning out airport bar patrons listening to various tiktoks

working real blue in the group chat today