[first day as a shepherd]

boss: where are you going?

me: [pointing] star

boss: what? why

me: [shrugging] baby

Not the girl next to me watching TSITP during a lecture ☠️

i think i just saved my parents like $8k by scribbling numbers on a piece of paper until the salesperson reduced the interest rate to something reasonable

justice for the em-dash

I just completed "Historian Hysteria" - Day 1 - Advent of Code 2024 #AdventOfCode adventofcode.com/2024/day/1

theatre mfs be like “ghost light, girl boss, gate keep 💅”

ok but like the bathroom thing has to be some kind of kink at this point https://twitter.com/PopBase/status/1588958549627260928

once again, i simply did not need to know that your ween is hairy https://twitter.com/HSHQ/status/1586443492896559105

what the actual fuck i hate this man so much https://twitter.com/elonmusk/status/1577880686282919937

twitter.com/fasc1nate/status/1576522...

the fossil fuel industry is incredibly fucked up but that doesn’t change the fact that the meat industry has a much larger impact on climate change than any other single factor twitter.com/ClimateHuman/status/1567...

researching candidates to vote for in the primaries makes me feel so good. i also applied to be a poll worker! feeling like such a good citizen 💪

can confirm this is true twitter.com/soapyhadid/status/154270...

please read this. the fact that people are channeling their time, money, and outrage into trying to help women get access to abortions is a beautiful response to such a draconian decision from the court. however, red states have made it clear that they will (1/5) https://t.co/hgE8IZVtoO

imagine having so small of a dick that you decide to invalidate an entire country’s reproductive rights

i don’t trust people who use the dick pic app twitter.com/myeshachou/status/153900...

new username just dropped

no problem? more like no, problem.

okay but running on an anti-furry platform is actually kind of genius twitter.com/RightWingCope/status/152...

dear god joe read the fucking room https://twitter.com/POTUS/status/1525257398163759110

can we talk about how extremely online mfs always remember to give their sources a full mla citation even if said sources are just tumblr users from 2011

dear god our country is run by incels twitter.com/LolOverruled/status/1523...

i hate him so much. so so so much twitter.com/WatcherGuru/status/15185...

vote twitter.com/pinkmattur/status/151442...

or the quotient twitter.com/josiahhughes/status/1513...

everyone. i have some very exciting news for you. as of today, i am officially commissioned as a notary public by the state of florida. look at that signature from good ole ronny d

fucking hell https://twitter.com/paraga/status/1511320953598357505

jacob collier is 100 gecs for intellectuals who understand the concept of moderation