Tomorrow, Donald Trump will have a food-insecure Amazon driver with a severe bladder infection caused by a lack of bathroom breaks stop by the White House to deliver 12 new flat-screen televisions and tell him how great the economy is.
The reality of this is horrible, and the optics were so staggeringly bad. It's like someone inside is trying to further tank Trump's approval ratings. I bet it was Melania's idea.
Ah, yes. Noted humorist Donald Trump, who tried to defend it but did not say in any way that it was a joke.
Two things here:
1) The idea that “morality” does not intersect with the decision to go to war and kill people is hilarious.
2) JD Vance announcing a book on his conversion to Catholicism just as Donald Trump starts shit-talking the Pope is the most JD Vance thing EVER.
Fellow Chicago-area folks, I have procured my @cheekface.bsky.social tickets. You should do likewise, post-haste. It is good for the soul.
I enthusiastically second this smart piece by @markjacob.bsky.social. Cancel the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Now.
Question: Has the so-called pope made a single arrest since he became the Vicar of Christ in 2025? The answer is no.
"Why can’t the pope speak the truth and care for souls while also kicking a little bad-guy a--?"
www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...
Trump’s right. We need a pope who’s tough on crime.
My column on Lil' Woke Pope Leo XIV:
www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...
I THOUGHT IT WAS ME AS A DOCTOR!
Man, Amazon's delivery service is getting out of hand.
I’m betting they took the Trump-as-Jesus post down because they realized they didn’t give the eagles machine guns. They’ll repost it when it’s fixed.
JD Vance fails, Trump goes to a UFC fight as your gas prices soar. MAGA?
My reflections on the Trump administration's whirlwind weekend of failure:
www.usatoday.com/story/opinio...
INVADE THE VATICAN!
MAKE THE MIDDLE AGES GREAT AGAIN!
For tomorrow morning’s column, my description of Trump’s plan to block the Strait of Hormuz:
“Iran is already blocking the strait, so Trump’s threats sounds a bit like if Winston Churchill responded to Adolf Hitler’s 1940 bombing raids on London by threatening to also bomb London.”
THE DALAI LAMA IS WEAK ON MONETARY POLICY.
Trump praying: “Our father, who art weak on crime, hallowed be my name, Thy Pope is a loser, Thy will be whatever, Iran can never have a nuke…”
Thanks to Trump, people will finally start buying my JWWOC (Jesus Was Weak On Crime) bracelets.
BREAKING: Trump says he will use the U.S. Marines to break the U.S. Navy’s blockade of the Strait of Hormuz, which he ordered to block Iran’s blockade
@ericswalwell X.com I am suspending my campaign for Governor. To my family, staff, friends, and supporters, I am deeply sorry for mistakes in judgment l've made in my past. I will fight the serious, false allegations that have been made — but that's my fight, not a campaign's.
boy bye
JD Vance negotiating with a used-car salesman:
"I'll give you $12,000 for this one, not a penny more."
"Nope, Mr. Vance. It's $16,000."
"You will take $12,500."
"No. And I'd like you to leave, you're scaring the customers."
"$13,000!"
"You can pay me $20,000, get no car and scram."
"DONE!!"
Trump attended a UFC fight and then spent the next day golfing, giving JD Vance a wide berth to fail at everything. This is an administration at the top of its game!
Trump enjoying his golf club today while Americans continue to struggle with gas and electricity prices
JD Vance’s streak of sucking at everything continues!
My succinct Strait of Hormuz synopsis:
All Iran needs to do now is tell Trump it is implementing a "Triple-Dog, No-Reverses Blockade" of the Strait of Hormuz and it will win.
Hard to believe JD Vance’s charm and likability failed him this time.
Marco Rubio looks like he drank Pete Hegseth.
I was told we won.
