I simply do not care enough about hello kitty to joke about it which means unfortunately it is real and it is haunting

Like what do you mean by that

What do you mean hello kitty is a British third grader in a furry costume

Goddamnit I hate when men have correct opinions

Don’t even, we all know it’s the blandest of the berries

I think this every day but also I have a couch in my office where I take naps some days so that’s almost worth being the cornerstone of my company

Your deadlines are so fucked

Using my last 1% of battery to declare blueberries as the worst berry. Thank you and goodnight.

Terrible books get published every week. For every book I thought was absolute dog shit, there were literally thousands of readers who wholeheartedly believed otherwise.

Being afraid of failure is fine. It’s normal. Write anyway. Do it scared.

Book binding is right up there with Anne Rice and Cassie Clare as top fanfic enemies

If I could get more than 4 words out without coughing, I would be ripping into my health insurance’s ASS. Make sure they’re recording the call for the grand jury to play back when I threaten to change the course of someone’s entire life.

Thankfully I hold grudges like the Seine holds shit water.

Filing my taxes at the nth hour while I’m coughing so violently my body is spasming but my insurance that just went up 15% doesn’t cover at home nebulizers i ❤️ usa

All I want is to be able to smell and taste again so I can order Indian

My coworker called tonight; between me being miserably sick and her dealing with work drama, we needed to vent. She called right as I watched Christina Koch walk out of the spaceship. She hadn’t even realized their return was today. After we hung up, something occurred to me. I thought I’d share. ❤️

I wish Sunday me knew that this was actually a warning sign for today me’s RSV diagnosis.

Had the kind of Sunday nap where I woke up no longer knowing who I was or what day it is

I made this the sound when I plug my phone into the charger and it makes me laugh every time

Absolutely fascinated every time an author in high fantasy chooses to address toileting. There’s no demand for it—the readers’ suspension of disbelief still allows for us to silently acknowledge that characters must use the bathroom—so when an author drops it in, I always wonder what’s the reasoning

Did you know you can buy pineapple dole whip in the morherfucking STORE?? And it’s INCREDIBLE. Oh my god, it’s so good. I have one little treat cup almost every day, I don’t give a FUCK what the calories on these bitches are. This is ambrosia to me. Mother’s milk. God’s forbidden fruit. Why is it so good?? It’s in a bright yellow and green box with little pineapple chunks and what I’m assuming is a tiki bar theme, and that’s delightful in the freezer. I think you can also buy these in pints but the box of four small cups is perfect. And you are perfect.

Buy these. Take one out and wait 5-10 minutes. Straight euphoria on your tongue I swear

Trying not to be mad at the autumnal-like reprieve from the recent heat wave, but the wind fucking WRECKED my 3’ monsteras

Unfortunately I scheduled too much Important Shit so it’ll be an Easter miracle, arguably as big as the resurrection, if I leave work by 6 😭

Is it too late for me to become religious and take Good Friday off

I do not want to be important at work, I simply want to blob

While you’re at it, search “your problem, not mine” because this author must think it’s the wittiest fucking retort in all the land

There are a hundred ways to describe the concepts of cold or wet without using “coldness” and “wetness”, and learning to do so will make you a better writer. I’m Inky, and this is my Master Class.

Oh my god the pillow princesses are going to be insufferable

This show was truly bonkers. Someone really said what if we take a bunch of hot ass actors and condense this EXCESSIVELY long-for-no-reason book into a limited series, make nothing make sense, and distract from the silly goose magic effects with some hot as fuck chemistry between the leads? SAY LESS

@erroneous.bsky.social reminded me of this show and remember when I was losing my gd mind over it and then it suddenly got TOO GOOFY

Someone with A Kingdom of Flesh and Fire ebook please search “chips of amber” and tell me how many times that phrase appears because I’m guessing no less than 400

Oh boy do I know. I’m from there, so all my family are bitching about it