Getting face controlled at coachella by being asked to name 3 members from katseye and immediately being escorted at gunpoint to the designated oklou containment pen

the weekend, so i probably got another 3-4 in me

how many pit beefs do yall think i can i house while karen’s out of town

it’s a beautiful spring day you know what that means: time to listen to Hum very loudly and fold laundry

getting mad at turnstile for wearing a 29th Street Tavern hat during their Coachella set, please don’t blow up the spot, there are only so many places to get a $3 bottle of Natty Boh and a shitty hamburger in Baltimore

we gotta bring nextel back, i wanna be chirp chirping the homies up at 3pm on a tuesday

gm to baltimore oriole pete alonso

about to log into my work email for the first time in 16 days, bro i’m so fuckin scared rn

i……can’t exactly say no…..

Claudia Sheinbaum has announced that Goku and Vegeta will be training the Mexican Army’s Cuerpo de Fuerzas Especiales on how to do a kamehameha

WBAL in Baltimore helping viewers understand the difference between watches and warnings

a marmoset running along a wooden fence

the same marmoset looking up into a guava tree

take a look at this lil fucker

yall wanna see some boats

VRUNT CONSIDERS TAKING OVER JACK ANTONOFF'S MARRIAGE TO MARGARET QUALLEY — FBN.

skrimpz, fries, and a salad on da beach

da beach

the american mind could never comprehend eating a mountain of fried shrimp and fries for like $12 while sitting right on the beach

my blind item is that i had a class in high school with a fairly successful MLB player and i would describe him as “very nice and very very simple” in the most generous terms, so yeah

really impressed by what brazil considers acceptable breakfast food. i just ate a plate full of hot dogs in tomato sauce and boiled cassava. this is the kind of breakfast anarchy we need in modern times to break free from the prison of our own ego

check this shit out

my favorite thing in brazil is when they ask us something and we think we ask for the check and nod but instead they bring us two more beers

the whole country is just a lil sweaty

i did clean it!!’

ipanema beach in rio de janeiro with a disappointing lack of shibumis

Beaches here are okay, they’d be a lot better if they got some fuckin shibumi action going

me on vacation in brazil (very wise), laughing at the people on vacation in dubai (very dumb): haha

every person in boston seeing this and going yeah that's fuckin right put him up there

the Iraq and Afghanistan wars were woke and gay but not this one you see

who up tryna see some monkeys

i can hear the favelas absolutely blasting lil jon all the way from my hotel…i’m home

adding brazil to my list of countries with a Dudes Hanging Out-based economy

insane view from our hotels breakfast