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Posts by Theo Lorenz (theonicole)

LOTS of Swedes settled in MN! Looks like a previous owner of my house named LJ Peterson may have been one of them

1 week ago 1 0 1 0
A finely illustrated cartoon in the Swedish newspaper: a smiling girl opening an iron gate to two visitors. They’re all wearing clothes from the 1700s.

A finely illustrated cartoon in the Swedish newspaper: a smiling girl opening an iron gate to two visitors. They’re all wearing clothes from the 1700s.

"Oh, Father Toni, my mother is getting better"

1 week ago 7 0 1 0
The mostly gutted dormer in my house. The original roof cuts a diagonal line through the wall. Overhead, the edge of the old roof protrudes into the space. They didn’t connect the dormer roof to the original roof, just built on top of it

The mostly gutted dormer in my house. The original roof cuts a diagonal line through the wall. Overhead, the edge of the old roof protrudes into the space. They didn’t connect the dormer roof to the original roof, just built on top of it

Looking up over the original roof, which is covered in newspapers

Looking up over the original roof, which is covered in newspapers

Sewn batts of newspaper in the ceiling

Sewn batts of newspaper in the ceiling

A 1932 Swedish newspaper called Vagledaren

A 1932 Swedish newspaper called Vagledaren

They opened up the ceiling expecting to have loose insulation rain down, but it turns out the dormer isn’t open to the rest of the roof, just sitting on top of it, and insulated mostly by Swedish newspapers

1 week ago 5 0 2 0

The company we hired specializes in renovating old homes, and chatting with the demo crew is fascinating! I’m learning about all the weird transitional materials used in my home when the attic was finished

1 week ago 11 0 2 0

Oof yeah, that’s tough! At least if you need to renovate one for accessibility you’ll have another one to use in the meantime?

1 week ago 1 0 1 0
A 1938 newspaper ad that reads ā€œ Martin A Hogan: Democratic candidate for Congress, third district of Minnesota. Mr. Hogan is a liberal. He is fearless and able. He is worthy of support of the voters of all parties.ā€ The man in the photo has a bad haircut and no smile.

A 1938 newspaper ad that reads ā€œ Martin A Hogan: Democratic candidate for Congress, third district of Minnesota. Mr. Hogan is a liberal. He is fearless and able. He is worthy of support of the voters of all parties.ā€ The man in the photo has a bad haircut and no smile.

A screenshot from the historical voting records the year that Mr. Hogan lost. Of the three candidates that ran for the third district, republican John G Alexander got 53,442 votes, farmer-labor candidate Henry G Teagan got 50,505 votes, and Mr. Martin got 14,073 votes.

A screenshot from the historical voting records the year that Mr. Hogan lost. Of the three candidates that ran for the third district, republican John G Alexander got 53,442 votes, farmer-labor candidate Henry G Teagan got 50,505 votes, and Mr. Martin got 14,073 votes.

Found in the wall: this 1938 newspaper campaign ad for Martin A. Hogan, a congressional candidate who lost with only 8% of the votes.

8% was also the early polling number for 2016 presidential joke candidate Deez Nuts. It could be said that Mr. Hogan was the Deez Nuts of the Great Depression.

1 week ago 14 0 2 0
The upstairs landing of my home yesterday, with most of the landing and the alcove beyond it divided off by a temporary wall made of two by fours and plastic sheeting. The light from the windows in the alcove is shining through the plastic.

The upstairs landing of my home yesterday, with most of the landing and the alcove beyond it divided off by a temporary wall made of two by fours and plastic sheeting. The light from the windows in the alcove is shining through the plastic.

Day two, the alcove and stair landing from the opposite direction inside the plastic sheeting. The alcove has been stripped bare of its plaster walls, exposing the bones of the original studs and the slope of the roof where the dormer ends. There are bits of newspaper and something fuzzy and gray as insulation still left in spots. Where windows once were, there is now only chipboard screwed in place.

Day two, the alcove and stair landing from the opposite direction inside the plastic sheeting. The alcove has been stripped bare of its plaster walls, exposing the bones of the original studs and the slope of the roof where the dormer ends. There are bits of newspaper and something fuzzy and gray as insulation still left in spots. Where windows once were, there is now only chipboard screwed in place.

This week we started construction to add a second bathroom to the house. I’ve been planning this project for a decade but somehow never realized that contractors making demo noises in my house at 8am would mean I can’t sleep past 8am. Anyway, this is days 1 and 2 of progress.

1 week ago 21 0 4 0
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The upstairs landing of my home yesterday, with most of the landing and the alcove beyond it divided off by a temporary wall made of two by fours and plastic sheeting. The light from the windows in the alcove is shining through the plastic.

The upstairs landing of my home yesterday, with most of the landing and the alcove beyond it divided off by a temporary wall made of two by fours and plastic sheeting. The light from the windows in the alcove is shining through the plastic.

Day two, the alcove and stair landing from the opposite direction inside the plastic sheeting. The alcove has been stripped bare of its plaster walls, exposing the bones of the original studs and the slope of the roof where the dormer ends. There are bits of newspaper and something fuzzy and gray as insulation still left in spots. Where windows once were, there is now only chipboard screwed in place.

Day two, the alcove and stair landing from the opposite direction inside the plastic sheeting. The alcove has been stripped bare of its plaster walls, exposing the bones of the original studs and the slope of the roof where the dormer ends. There are bits of newspaper and something fuzzy and gray as insulation still left in spots. Where windows once were, there is now only chipboard screwed in place.

This week we started construction to add a second bathroom to the house. I’ve been planning this project for a decade but somehow never realized that contractors making demo noises in my house at 8am would mean I can’t sleep past 8am. Anyway, this is days 1 and 2 of progress.

1 week ago 6 0 0 0

Co-pilot Wallace now has his own rainbow seatbelt cover! It goes with the rainbow seatbelt covers I made for the other front seats but is Wallace sized.

2 weeks ago 17 0 2 0
An old white guy named Jim standing proudly on the Lake Street bridge on a sunny day, smiling broadly and holding a handmade sign that says ā€œSupport trans rights, support trans families.ā€

An old white guy named Jim standing proudly on the Lake Street bridge on a sunny day, smiling broadly and holding a handmade sign that says ā€œSupport trans rights, support trans families.ā€

The last protest I was able to attend was for trans rights, in fall 2019. It was my dad’s last protest, and the visceral sense of belonging from standing with him that day still feeds my heart when I remember it.

If you’re out there marching today, I hope you take that feeling home with you.

3 weeks ago 38 4 0 1

My spouse has had 2 ambulance rides in 3 weeks and is wearing a heart monitor. My sleep is fucked from stress + construction noise nextdoor. Still feel guilty not attending the protest.

If asked ā€œWhere were you when…?ā€ guess I’ll say we were home, surviving the shit our neighbors were protesting.

3 weeks ago 34 1 4 0

Me too. I got Wallace during a driving lesson in 2016. We stopped at a garage sale to celebrate me finally not being a nervous wreck behind the wheel, and there he was, 25 cents and invaluable! He’s supervised most of my driving for the last decade and is a good little friend. 🄰

3 weeks ago 3 0 0 0

Co-pilot Wallace is ready to hit the road!

3 weeks ago 30 2 1 1
A small crocheted car seat in bright blue yarn. It has a headrest!

A small crocheted car seat in bright blue yarn. It has a headrest!

Front view of a small pink stuffed elephant named Wallace sitting in the car seat. He’s secured to the seat with a miniature 3-point seatbelt and looks ready for adventure.

Front view of a small pink stuffed elephant named Wallace sitting in the car seat. He’s secured to the seat with a miniature 3-point seatbelt and looks ready for adventure.

A side view of Wallace belted into his car seat. His seatbelt is a recycled fabric belt, the kind you use to keep your pants up.

A side view of Wallace belted into his car seat. His seatbelt is a recycled fabric belt, the kind you use to keep your pants up.

A back view of Wallace in his car seat. There’s a magazine pocket on the seat back. It’s currently holding a zine about geology.

A back view of Wallace in his car seat. There’s a magazine pocket on the seat back. It’s currently holding a zine about geology.

Is there a name for the thing where life gets so stressful that your sanity hinges on a silly little project? Anyway, I made the stuffed elephant who lives in my car his own little car seat

3 weeks ago 53 8 7 4
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My Facebook post: 

Today we said goodbye to my beloved green 2012 Hyundai Accent hatchback, Mabel Sprout Hyundai. I learned to drive late, so Mabel was my first car. In the 10 years I had her, she carried Lyft passengers and real estate clients, hauled lumber and thrifted treasures, hosted road trips, parallel parked in front of hundreds of houses, saw my family safely through tumultuous times and bad weather, and ferried half a dozen unhappy cats to and from the vet. 

I’ll never forget the time Mabel got stuck on an icy patch and a bunch of smiling gym bros jogged out of a nearby kickboxing gym, PICKED HER UP, and set her down on clear pavement. She really was a roller skate! The best roller skate. 

Mabel was donated to the Newgate School, where in her retirement she will help future mechanics learn the trade. She is survived by an electric blue 2016 Subaru Crosstrek named Magnus Burnsides Subluru, who will carry on her legacy of safe and colorful travels. (green and blue heart emojis side by side)

My Facebook post: Today we said goodbye to my beloved green 2012 Hyundai Accent hatchback, Mabel Sprout Hyundai. I learned to drive late, so Mabel was my first car. In the 10 years I had her, she carried Lyft passengers and real estate clients, hauled lumber and thrifted treasures, hosted road trips, parallel parked in front of hundreds of houses, saw my family safely through tumultuous times and bad weather, and ferried half a dozen unhappy cats to and from the vet. I’ll never forget the time Mabel got stuck on an icy patch and a bunch of smiling gym bros jogged out of a nearby kickboxing gym, PICKED HER UP, and set her down on clear pavement. She really was a roller skate! The best roller skate. Mabel was donated to the Newgate School, where in her retirement she will help future mechanics learn the trade. She is survived by an electric blue 2016 Subaru Crosstrek named Magnus Burnsides Subluru, who will carry on her legacy of safe and colorful travels. (green and blue heart emojis side by side)

One of the last photos of my car: A bright green hatchback named Mabel, parked in the lot at the place I donated her today. There’s a dent on her side that’s covered by a green bandaid bumper sticker and her hood is a little bit sun bleached, but she’s not looking bad for a 14 year old Minnesota car

One of the last photos of my car: A bright green hatchback named Mabel, parked in the lot at the place I donated her today. There’s a dent on her side that’s covered by a green bandaid bumper sticker and her hood is a little bit sun bleached, but she’s not looking bad for a 14 year old Minnesota car

One of my first pictures of Mabel: a selfie I took with her the day I bought her in 2016. We were so young!

One of my first pictures of Mabel: a selfie I took with her the day I bought her in 2016. We were so young!

Mabel parked in a wooded area along Great River Road, surrounded by fallen leaves and trees turning yellow

Mabel parked in a wooded area along Great River Road, surrounded by fallen leaves and trees turning yellow

Donated my car today. Thanks for a decade of safe trips, Mabel šŸ’š

1 month ago 35 2 6 0

SO MUCH BOOOOOO

1 month ago 3 0 0 0

Did you know that if your medication is lost in a house fire, health insurance can refuse to replace it right away because you’re ā€œnot due for a refill yet???ā€

Fuck’s sake, America.

1 month ago 16 1 4 0

I got to drop off some groceries for Anya’s family today. Her dad is back with them and in good spirits!

2 months ago 18 5 1 0

Costco is a team sport

2 months ago 24 2 0 0
Post from r/crochet that says "mods are gone. All hail Mr. Nipples" and its a picture of the most disgusting crocheted doll/creature thats pink and has a creepy smile and horns and big pink nipples. It's truly horrifying

Post from r/crochet that says "mods are gone. All hail Mr. Nipples" and its a picture of the most disgusting crocheted doll/creature thats pink and has a creepy smile and horns and big pink nipples. It's truly horrifying

I need everyone to know that on the crochet subreddit the mods made a big post about how they're taking a week off because there was too much fighting/political posts. so there's currently no mods on r/crochet and people are being absolutely insane

2 months ago 6636 2023 119 198
A siren against a dark cloudy sky with the text "It is Wednesday my dudes"

A siren against a dark cloudy sky with the text "It is Wednesday my dudes"

2 months ago 42 4 2 2
Screenshot from the handout I give my buyers about showings: 
ā€œSpecial 2026 ICE occupation edition FAQ

What if we have showings scheduled but I’m too exhausted from *gestures at everything*?
That’s a legitimate reason to cancel! We all need extra grace right now. Don’t overthink it, just let me know.

What happens if we run into an ICE altercation during showings?
If you’re in a position to stop and help our neighbors, I will join you. If you need to remove yourself from the situation for your own safety, I will do everything in my power to keep you safe. 

If ICE comes to the door of a house we’re touring, do you have to let them in? 
I am literally not allowed to let them in because I don’t have the seller’s permission (smiley face with hearts around it)ā€

Screenshot from the handout I give my buyers about showings: ā€œSpecial 2026 ICE occupation edition FAQ What if we have showings scheduled but I’m too exhausted from *gestures at everything*? That’s a legitimate reason to cancel! We all need extra grace right now. Don’t overthink it, just let me know. What happens if we run into an ICE altercation during showings? If you’re in a position to stop and help our neighbors, I will join you. If you need to remove yourself from the situation for your own safety, I will do everything in my power to keep you safe. If ICE comes to the door of a house we’re touring, do you have to let them in? I am literally not allowed to let them in because I don’t have the seller’s permission (smiley face with hearts around it)ā€

Updating my client handouts has been fun and normal

2 months ago 32 4 2 0
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The adorable little calico cat has shifted around, so her face is now shoved between my stomach and the pillow my laptop is on. My arm is resting across her, and she’s got one foot in my sleeve

The adorable little calico cat has shifted around, so her face is now shoved between my stomach and the pillow my laptop is on. My arm is resting across her, and she’s got one foot in my sleeve

A close up of her perfect little face. So smooshed. So peaceful.

A close up of her perfect little face. So smooshed. So peaceful.

Update: oh no

2 months ago 16 0 0 0

That seems fair

2 months ago 1 0 0 0
A small, adorable dilute calico cat curled up on a pillow in the chair right next to me, snoozing. She looks deeply at peace.

A small, adorable dilute calico cat curled up on a pillow in the chair right next to me, snoozing. She looks deeply at peace.

How am I supposed to get work done under these conditions

2 months ago 28 0 3 0

That’s a-okay, I’m mostly interested in gut feelings about the idea. If the idea makes people feel bad/gross, it’s not a good fit for something meant to comfort

2 months ago 2 0 0 0

Any coloring pages I make would be free to distribute, with the intent of helping people process/grieve and find a little stress reduction or catharsis. The image of objects lovingly collected at a memorial makes me feel held by community, but I don’t want to assume it’s the same for others.

2 months ago 3 0 0 0

Question for Minneapolis friends: I’m thinking of making coloring pages about resistance and community. One of the images that’s calling to me most is the objects left at community memorial sites—flowers, candles, signs, etc. Does that seem like a disrespectful/not okay subject for a coloring page?

2 months ago 5 0 2 0

Minnesota folks: if you know someone who needs a flight to MSP after being detained in Texas, standwithminnesota.com has collected donated SkyMiles to help them get home -- spread the word!

2 months ago 320 220 7 2
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A stack of thin pink books that say OBSTETRIX * NAOMI KRITZER on the spine

A stack of thin pink books that say OBSTETRIX * NAOMI KRITZER on the spine

HEY I AM DOING A FUNDRAISER FOR MINNESOTA RENT FUNDS

AND GIVING AWAY A SIGNED ARC (advance review copy) OF OBSTETRIX

THAT'S RIGHT YOU CAN HELP MINNESOTA FAMILIES AND MAYBE GET A FREE EARLY SIGNED COPY OF MY BOOK

2 months ago 802 563 11 44