looking good sir

Playing Empty Bottle next week

OPEN THE FUCKIN’ STRAIT OF MORBOOZE

You let the Goose Island offerings lapse once at work and mfers won’t let you hear the end of it

Brutal timing

Why the fuck am I looking at Reels on LinkedIn

THE DAILY EXTRA Good Friday Today is Good Friday. The Christian holiday commemorates the crucifixion and death of Jesus of Nazareth. Good Friday is observed during Holy Week, the week between Palm Sunday and Easter, when Christians reflect on the sacrifice of Jesus and anticipate Easter's celebration of the resurrection. (answer to Thursday's question: Matthew McConaughey)

Happy Good Friday to whoever puts together the trivia/jokes/fun facts on my Peanuts calendar to set up this fucking masterpiece.

Frame #6746 from E37 The Plant

Siri how much is a subscription to MAD Magazine these days

He does keep looking up and around as to check who’s gazing upon his periodical

Dude next to me on the train is reading a physical copy of the New Yorker. Okay, guy

Y’all need less C2E2 and more filing your W2s taxes are due in 17 days

Tony Gwynn. As a pure lefty, Ken and Tony were my guys.

Capping off No Kings with Little Caesars Italian Cheese Bread™️

Royal Match ad where some sort of King is trying to hold rocks from falling on him and you need to solve some matching puzzle to prevent it happening.

I have no interest in this man’s problems

Paul Skenes ghost wrote this

These fucking goons kill US citizens, what makes you believe that they can calculate liquid allowances in my Dopp kit

You listen to ONE Show Me The Body song and the algo serves that band for all of eternity. I was simply making fun of that song with the lads. I was being a hater. That was the one time I invite my CIA handler to listen in on my phone to make that assessment. It is the liquid shits.

RE9 DLC idea: same locale but it’s St. Patrick’s Day weekend

If I open this do you think they’ll give my dumbass a Purple Heart

The claymation AI slop/‘lofi beats to genocide to’ playing on the White House YT page before the SOTU is fucking me up

I am jestermaxxing
I am workmaxxing
I am rentmaxxing
I am subscriptionmaxxing
I am hobbycommodificationmaxxing
I am glimmerleavingmygazemaxxing

FUCK YEAH! Congrats!

The game my friends and I spent 8 years working on outside work is finally done! We're proud to present COLD CALLING, a real time puzzle game where you man the White House switchboard during a satirical, alternate history Cold War.

#indiegame #alternatehistory #comedygame #majorupdate

the other 40% of things I knew facts about in 1998:
-15% The World Wrestling Federation Monday Night Raw television program
-15% Launch angles off of the T in T-Ball because I was a goddamn prodigy
-5% Sonic Spinball

Bart Simpson waving the green flag at the Daytona 500 today should've happened in 1998 when NASCAR and The Simpsons were 60% of things I knew facts about, because 7-year-old Maxwell would've had a fucking aneurysm

I’m afraid I’ve got bad news

Coaching sports is basically just an auto-battler

[Wesley Willis voice]

And they just played Screaming Trees. Whoever is in the booth tonight on aux should play TAD next to really bring this to a screeching halt