Whenever I hear someone say “jester-maxing”, all I can think of is how Holden Caulfield would call them “phonies” then proceed to blame the prostitute he hired for his mommy issues.

I smell so good rn

Rant: I saw the perfect plane ticket to get from Grand Rapids to San Diego for coming home from Electric Forest last week. Great price, perfect time. But because I don’t get my first paycheck for another five days, I didn’t buy it and now it’s gone not just super expensive but gone!

Meme: I’m the blockade now

I though this was a picture of Kori King at first, but then I realized that no it truly is Suzie Toot

So did you sleep girl?

Are they truly an ally if they don’t laugh?

Boys, I’m tired. I can’t be coming up with cheeky horny skeets if the world keeps on almost ending.

Clap them cheeks

Thanks Obama

Having red the news this is no longer true 😰

All
I
Can
Think
About
Today
Is
Penis

Aictatip if you will

Stop that train legitimately looks so good and not just because I’m train autistic

Cartoon image of Jesus with his hands covering his eyes but he can see through his hands because of being crucified and all that jazz

Fat Cock Good Friday

Like is he already sad at the idea of you saying yes??????

I say meet kink shame but this kink always has me second guessing.

The emoji is so confusing. Like what does it even mean???

The number of people in my life who straight up don’t think we launched a rocket to the moon yesterday let alone that we’ve ever been to the moon is concerning.

I just hope I’m in public when it happens.

All too common a proble these days

Praise be

I think my gym has become … gay

Do people care about having a collar at work anymore? Can I just be a no collar worker? I hate buttons

USC and ABC7 news LA are excluding every candidate color from the CA governor debate. Give them a call and complain!

USC Dean office: (213) 740-2531
ABC7: (818) 863-7777

at 32, putting Eagle Scout on my resume is either the most endearing thing you've ever seen or a cry for help, and honestly I'm not sure which one I'm hoping for

I like seeing tears in a boys eyes. It tells me I’m finally deep enough in his throat.

“In the navy” is a gay poppers hit

Walks up in shamed and embarrassed gay 🌈: is the Oscar’s this week?

Oh we’re showing singlets with peen? Count me in.

Up at 6am for an 8am on boarding meeting for a job I don’t k ow the pay of yet. We really are in a recession.