We are gonna miss you Jim “Moist Jordan” Middleton

i love that in addition to everything else, elon musk is the dumbest asshole on the planet

“Me am not that kind of orc” I say to my boss as he accuses me of time theft

Blackout drunk. Screaming at my family that The Grinch was radicalized by the Whos’ own Whobris. "The Earth is littered with the ruins of empires that believed they were eternal". We ‘ve learned nothing from Iraq

Every single time I come here GA doesn’t play and now Dame too… FUCK

Kha$h silky smooth

The elves in my keyboard got tired so I get to take a break from spreadsheets😋

Earned

What did he do?

You can’t save a draft on here because they stopped doing that in 1973 #bringbackthedraft

*takes sizeable bite out of Nerf© football*

Yummy snacks near me

Pokémon go to the polls

The reports of their death were greatly exaggerated

Dive bar bibimbap

Beautiful service for a beautiful guy!

Naruto really went and named his son burrito

She blue my sky til I tweet

So this is Twitter now