@jimmykimmel.com the only dude resurrected during the rapture today.

Bluesky doesn’t wind me up as much as the other platforms which means I should be here more often. And only post silly things like these frogs at the bottom of a well.

THE FIRINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL THE JOBS REPORT IMPROVES!!!

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Senator Cory Booker once ran into a burning building to save a woman. He’s doing the same right now for the United States of America. Thank you Senator Booker for standing up for us. @corybooker.bsky.social

Opinion | I’m a Republican Who Still Supports Ukraine. America Must Not Give In to Putin. (Gift Article) The administration must be crystal clear that we are aligned with democracy, free markets and the rule of law.

A Republican with (some) courage.

www.nytimes.com/2025/03/31/o...

Image my surprise when, on Jan. 6th my friend was screaming about how the election was stolen and what else were they supposed to do. Now TFG is floating another balloon, talking about a third term. Pop this shit right now. 🎈 💥

In 2020, well before the election, TFG started threatening to ignore the results of the election if he lost. My one remaining MAGA friend laughed at my “paranoia” and said he was just “floating a trial balloon.” 🧵🪡

Rise up. Shut it down.

Pretty straight forward.

Before slandering the reporter you invited to the group chat. Ask yourself why you invited him to the group chat.

A portion of John Quincy Adams' Amistad argument before SCOTUS: "I will not recur to the Declaration of Independence--your Honors have it implanted in your hearts--but one of the grievous charges brought against George III. was, that he had made laws for sending men beyond seas for trial. That was one of the most odious of those acts of tyranny which occasioned the American revolution. The whole of the reasoning is not applicable to this case, but I submit to your Honors that, if the President has the power to do it in the case of Africans, and send them beyond seas for trial, he could do it by the same authority in the case of American citizens. By a simple order to the marshal of the district, he could just as well seize forty citizens of the United States, on the demand of a foreign minister, and send them beyond seas for trial before a foreign court."

Was just reading John Quincy Adams' oral arguments before SCOTUS in the Amistad case and this part seems, uh, pretty relevant

Breaking: Pete Hegseth just accidentally sent me top secret photos of his junk.

The Trump Administration Accidentally Texted Me Its War Plans U.S. national-security leaders included me in a group chat about upcoming military strikes in Yemen. I didn’t think it could be real. Then the bombs started falling.

You cannot make this shit up. Sharing this jaw-dropping story with a gift link -- give it a read.

Trump Live Updates: Tariffs, Federal Layoffs and Greenland Backlash (Gift Article)

Only the best people. And by best he meant, the absolute worst:

www.nytimes.com/live/2025/03...

As an American, I want to see our nation recapture the strength and unity it once had when we fought the enemy instead of ourselves.” Senator Margaret Chase Smith, of Skowhegan, Maine, 1950

As an American, I condemn a Republican Fascist just as much as I condemn a Democrat Communist. They are equally dangerous to you and me and to our country. 🧵

The current age of McCarthyism is not intended to root out communism but rather anyone opposed to Trump. McCarthyism ended. So will Trumpism:

“I do not want to see the Republican Party ride to political victory on the Four Horsemen of Calumny—Fear, Ignorance, Bigotry and Smear,” she said. —🧵

Narrator: “they won’t be found.”

Trump could kill the USA in the middle of 5th avenue and his supporters wouldn’t care.

For a guy who wouldn’t shut up about egg prices he really wants us to shut up about egg prices.

Trump Says Recession Unfortunate But Necessary Step To Get To Depression WASHINGTON—Warning that Americans should brace themselves for an economic “period of transition,” President Donald Trump told reporters Monday that a recession would be an unfortunate but necessary st...

Trump Says Recession Unfortunate But Necessary Step To Get To Depression — theonion.com/trump-says-r...

Hard see how wiping out my dad and my mom’s retirement money is going to Make America Great Again. Also: eggs?

My 401k tells me that America is not great again.

MAGA: STOP CALLING US STUPID
Everyone sane: Stop claiming that there are transgender mice and gay bombers and we’ll consider it.

I’m not usually into property damage. Not usually.

He’s an absolute numpty.

Serious question. Now that Trump has announced and delayed and announced and delayed tariffs again, are we the dumbest country on earth?

I’m old enough to remember when Republicans hated Nazis and Russians.