THEM: Follow your heart.

MY HEART:

How many times do I have to be reminded not to wear white shirts when I go out for dinner, the sequel

bluesky: medicine is so good. love to take my medicine. love feeling better and not suffering from that thing

twitter: if you do anything to make your body feel better under any circumstances you are worse than adolf hitler

The only ethical consumption is tuberculosis

A machine ran 13 miles in 50 minutes? Wait until they hear about cars.

Daughters came home last night, dinner stretched into drinking soda and tea until midnight, chatting and laughing.

Custody schedule is two weeks now, so it feels like forever when we're apart.

Climb on me baby come in my arms and lose yourself entirely for a dozen hours

We are at war with Eurasia
We are at war with Eastasia
We at war with the combination Taco Bell / Pizza Hut

omg yes!

first date idea: we take shrooms and google obituaries of people who share our names

A burrito?

Cilantro basil dill mint lemons drying on a white towel

4/20 post herb

😬😬😬😬😬😬

And it's just Monday

universal feelings of soul-crushing rejection amirite

i had a friend who smoked pot and she married a man who wears tevas so no thank you

my ex used to call it that

i need to be able to protect myself from feral space hogs

fantastic, "Norm", that is, if my .22 meant for protecting the farm can achieve escape velocity of not only Earth's gravity but the Milky Way too

same

sorry if i seem kinda dumb today, it’s just that i’m dumb

meth will cause tuesdays, it's common

cat: *sees hardwood floor* that's a bed
cat: *sees laundry rack* that's a bed
cat: *sees stairs* that's a bed
cat: *sees my head* that's a bed
cat: *sees a cat bed* what the FUCK is that??

Everything is a crime if you're brave enough

Am I hungry? Or am I just bored? Do I feel like a treat or am I chewing to avoid biting through my own bones?

Black hole sun is just another name for the vagina.

Did everyone remember to put out blunts n edibles for Uncle Willie last night?

I did. Happy 420 🔥🗣️💨💨

Friend of mine said he saw Sam Altman at the club on Saturday. Dude was running around screaming "SHOW ME YOUR RETINAS!" at people and when the bouncers threw him out he just yelled "YOU CAN'T THROW ME OUT, YOU ARE AI!" Weird guy.

I don’t know who needs to hear this but the ocean says it loves you.