i think that all of the characters in she-ra formed a big gay polycule after the completion of the series and nobody can tell me otherwise

dating the Weird Girl ain’t for the weak. she hit me with a post-coital “wee snaw”

petition to start calling brats “pillow problems”

which one wears chacos and which one wears tevas

stop asking who wears the pants in queer relationships and start asking who wears the carabiner

i kissed my gf in the rain in front of the oscar meyer wienermobile this weekend, so i can die happy now tbh

my demons said we can hang out if your demons say it’s okay

happy “throw lime scooters in the mississippi” season to all who celebrate

two text messages: There’s a burnt out Tesla covered in graffiti on the side of 40 All I saw was the word penis

husband texted me

crossing my fingers for ya, buddy!!

okay crossover!!!!!

if jellycat made a magic wand, would it look like pic A or B?

location: jerking it at the gta strip club

not catholic or religious but maybe for lent I’ll give up

i’m gonna be brave and say it: owalas are ugly as fuck

honestly as dark as this timeline is, there’s gotta be one out there where i would have ended up a swiftie, so things really could be worse

*hisses at you* (lovingly)

currently absolutely ripped and one of my neighbors is playing like spa music i feel like im hallucinating

reality dating show producers: this is a ✨never before seen, radical social experiment✨

so close! it’s actually a violation of the geneva convention hope this helps!

gold star bisexual in that i have never made a single fucking decision in my life

caitlyn from arcane has been confirmed as half asian so get ready for me to be SO annoying about my next cosplay

i’m undoubtedly “a weird pickle thing”

who do i gotta beat up to get izombie back on streaming services?

Without downloading any new pictures, what is your energy going into 2025?

one of my partners just asked me if i get my ovaries removed if they can eat my eggs like caviar. i am saddened to announce i am no longer polyamorous.

i am filled with so much love but also with so much pee

just yelled at a man in target who was being a tool, and i gotta say, what a rush. how can i get paid to do that?

on one hand, i spent this morning at a really cool queer makers’ market. on the other, i saw someone put their bare ass on the light rail seat on the way home. you win some, you lose some

it’s not not working