My wife and I have agreed that we both want to be having more sex and apparently she’s already found the guy she wants to be having it with, too!

Getting a cat and naming it Quack so when it has it's nightly zoomies, we can call it Quack Attacks

It's so weird existing on my own for the first time ever, this bed feels huge... I could never use all of it.

La vee

When somebody asks me, how long is something gonna take? I always tell them twice as long as I actually think and then I just never do it at all.

Ask nice

I am on a mission to read 100 books this year... I'm currently almost done with the third book of the year... I know, I need to pick up the pace, but I started this one yesterday and will finish it before today ends... so maybe things are looking up.

Natural Beauty by Ling Ling Huang

So basically "I only know what MAGA daddy told me..."

You let them do it to immigrants, then you let them do it to minorities, then you let them do it to children, then you let them do it to your military service members, then you let them do it to your sons and daughters, and because of all of that, they now have all of the power to do it to you.

That’s the way the cookie breaks a part into lots of small pieces

Once again, a woman is taking the fall for men... they used her as a pawn to make it seem good that they were replacing her with someone even more unqualified and more dangerous. In a patriarchy like ours, women are used as pawns for men. Tools aren't protected, just discarded after use.

Marry Larry fuck Moe kill Curly

I can finally say I am actually 30 and flirty and thriving!!!

Exactly!!! Lol like... yay, she sucks... but he is probably going to be even worse.

Blake Shelton. Come on, you know I know who this is. The real question is how many people are gonna reply with ‘this isn’t…’ or ‘is this AI?’ or ‘I’m calling the police’. Ok maybe not that last one, but anyway, thanks for checking out this ALT text, it’s really good that we can be considerate and at the same time have some fun!

Blake Lively is an American actress known for Gossip Girl and films like The Town. A fashion icon and producer, she’s currently embroiled in a high‑profile legal battle with Justin Baldoni over alleged harassment during It Ends With Us, while balancing family life and ongoing film work

I mean... he seems quite intimiate with Kristi Knoem... so... I mean I feel like something bad happens and they just say that to cool everyone down and then they quietly move on as do we...

I feel like we get news that he is "asking" around about firing people every other week lol....

Good morning!

I love when historians describe something catastrophic as
‘this caused some tension’”

In 100 years, the situation we are living in right now might be described like that..

Play some for me?

There is only zuul!

Whisper dirty nothings in my ear

Thank you!!! 😊

Moi hahaha

I was in a comment thread, as one is, and casually going after men’s BS and all the men assumed I was straight and kept telling me no man will ever want me. I was so relieved.

You!! How could you... this feels like the ultimate betrayal tbh...

You got this! I believe in you!!!

Steinbeck: What did you think of my draft of 𝘖𝘧 𝘔𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘔𝘢𝘯?

Publisher: It needs more characters.

Steinbeck: I'll see what I can do.

Umm.... blech...