A cup of Chobani nonfat plain Greek yogurt with World Cup filigree on the lid.

Of course Chobani nonfat plain Greek yogurt has a World Cup tie-in. Soccer is the Chobani nonfat plain Greek yogurt of sports.

Happy 80th Birthday to the legendary Tim Curry! 🖤

It’s inaccurate to say Mario is brave and Luigi is cowardly

Luigi is afraid of death, so he runs away from danger. Mario is afraid of living, so he runs towards death. Both brothers are cowards in their own way

Jim Carey at his prime couldn't reproduce it

So this thread is distressing and amazing and depressingly hilarious but....

Either Flying Mezerkis doesn't know what rizz means or I don't and I teach middle school...

AH! Should've checked the Alt Text first. Ever the gentleman, Mr. North. Ever the gentleman.

To be fair to Tyrone, I feel like you should recreate this photo using a not-enormous person's hand.

Pro tip: add some* sour cream and a packet of ranch seasoning to literally any Hamburger Helper and you have made a Michelin-starred meal.

*Some=anywhere from a tablespoon to 18 cups

If he bought it on the fly after the plan was already in motion, is that really something you can purchase and install in, like, two days? During a holiday week?

The first time I watched it I thought they were going for a subplot where Jeremy Renner, M.D. just happened to be a serial killer.

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

I like this movie overall, but is there any explanation for why Jeremy Renner, M.D. has a human-sized vat of acid in his basement? I don't get it. Is that standard equipment for a small-town doctor?

Wake up babe, the new Seuss-Giger collab just dropped

description from Huntington library: "A lithograph printed on heavy paper. Satirical "death certificate" issued for the Southern Confederacy. Mourning border, each line in different typeface, with: Died, Near the South-Side Rail Road, / on Sunday, April 9th, 1865, / The Southern Confederacy, / Aged Four Years, / Conceived in Sin, Born in iniquity, Nurtured by Tyranny, Died of / a Chronic Attack of Punch. / Abraham Lincoln, Attending Physician. / U.S. Grant, Undertaker. / Jeff Davis, Chief Mourner. Below in smaller print an epitaph that ends with: And this one line shall grace your grave-- / Your death gave freedom to the slave." https://hdl.huntington.org/digital/collection/p16003coll6/id/5033

to all who celebrate...

Remember, they spell it "jauwn"

I watched every episode of both!

AND Harry Shearer! One could argue it counts as a Simpsons episode!

The "new" Godzilla (2014-present) looks like a giant angry poop emoji. It's a giant poop emoji. You can put all the Brians Cranston you want in the franchise. At the end of the day the monster is a giant green poop emoji.

1998 Godzilla is:

-A great movie
-A great 90's movie
-A great action movie
-A great action-comedy movie
-A great Godzilla movie
-Has great special effects
-Has one of the top 5 (maybe top 3) soundtracks of the 90's
-Has a top 5 ensemble cast of the 90's
-Best creature design outside the original

you, a fool: it's impossible to qualify who has the "best" life, due to the immense complexity of--
me, grabbing the mic: the bear from the bear baiting scene on Game of Thrones demanded frying pans full of whipped cream between every take, and everyone had to applaud him while he ate

I recently read Bram Stoker's Dracula for the first time and it mentions Jonathan Harker owning a Kodak camera. Took me out of the story for awhile because it seemed so out of place. I guess horror authors have always had a fascination with the cutting-edge technology of their day.

Written by a friend and former coworker's wife

I really think it may just be that the author doesn't want to associate with the primary stars of the original series anymore since many of them have publicly disagreed with her hateful views. She just wants a new version/cast to become relevant. (Didn't think of this myself, not sure who to credit)

BREAKING NEWS: Lucy offers to hold football!

Today just jumped to the top of the list of Funniest Days For It To Happen

I understand the people running this account have some weird affinity for Bill Maher and that's bad enough, but putting Paul fucking Begala on my feed? WTF is wrong with you?

Damn…looks like Death finally Chuck Norrised.

When you block me I make a funny little noise like a bluetooth speaker disconnecting

Spock was telling the truth when he said he was a descendant of Sherlock Holmes and I'll Q-Tip fight anyone who denies it

I'm only 40 for the next 3 weeks. Team up to average it out?

A neon light art piece of Samuel Beckett's famous quote "I can't go on. I'll go on" but spaced - it would seem inadvertently- so that it reads "I can't goon. I'll goon".

The formatting of this Beckett quote does still represent resilience and determination, just of a very different sort.