so, I changed the title and header image of today’s post. I think more accurately depicts our current state of affairs, and aligns better with the narrative I wrote below it.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER. now go read the damned thing: bit.ly/4cD4eIb
flailing flailboy Preznit Fuckwit continues to flail as he searches for a magic bullet with which to end his unwinnable don’t-you-dare-call-it-a-clusterfuck-of-a-war on Iran. weak, stupid and cognitively impaired, Donny changes his strategy at least as often as he changes his diaper — but not even one of his fuckbrained schemes has come even close to working. and now he’s been reduced to just making shit up as he goes along, throwing every goddamned thing at the wall, hoping against hope that something finally sticks. spoiler alert: nothing is sticking — and Iran is eating Donny’s lunch.
Preznit Fuckwit blundered into an unwinnable war and has been outplayed by Iran. they refuse to negotiate, they won't open the Strait, they laugh at his threats, and they're ignoring his blockade. Iran is farting in his general direction. I mock it all in today's post. link is here: bit.ly/4cD4eIb
I was 18 years old in 1975. I remember it too
FUCK ME!
so, I changed the title and header image of today’s post. I think more accurately depicts our current state of affairs, and aligns better with the narrative I wrote below it.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER. now go read the damned thing: bit.ly/4cD4eIb
flailing flailboy Preznit Fuckwit continues to flail as he searches for a magic bullet with which to end his unwinnable don’t-you-dare-call-it-a-clusterfuck-of-a-war on Iran. weak, stupid and cognitively impaired, Donny changes his strategy at least as often as he changes his diaper — but not even one of his fuckbrained schemes has come even close to working. and now he’s been reduced to just making shit up as he goes along, throwing every goddamned thing at the wall, hoping against hope that something finally sticks. spoiler alert: nothing is sticking — and Iran is eating Donny’s lunch.
Preznit Fuckwit blundered into an unwinnable war and has been outplayed by Iran. they refuse to negotiate, they won't open the Strait, they laugh at his threats, and they're ignoring his blockade. Iran is farting in his general direction. I mock it all in today's post. link is here: bit.ly/4cD4eIb
here's today's post: "impaired elderly golfer tacos his way into another ceasefire" — President Weak and Stupid gets played again.
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oh my god I'm so jealous that I didn't think of that
all of this would be hilarious if it were happening in some small, powerless third world banana republic, where some tinpot’s disastrous decisions would have no effect beyond its own borders — but this is the United Goddamned States of America. everything we do affects the whole planet. all it took were the reckless actions of one moron to destabilize the entire world’s economy. how is that even allowed to be a thing? ‘what if the leader of a country were a fucking moron?’ is a great premise when it’s a movie like Duck Soup. not so much, however, when you have a real-life Donald J. Firefly in command of a nuclear arsenal.
it's insane that we live in a world where the impulsive actions of one thin-skinned imbecile can fuck shit up for the entire planet. big, strong readers with tears in their eyes are saying to me, "sir! sir! thank you for your angry post about it, sir!" link is here: bit.ly/3QkGa5v
as unlikely as it may seem, somehow the Shitwit Brigade of Witkoff, Kushner and Couchfuck McGee were actually making headway — but then Preznit Fuckwit started posting once again about how he was going to bomb the shit out of Iran if they didn’t dance to his tune, at which point the Iranian negotiating team was all ‘why the fuck are we even talking to you?’
so, Donny's ace team of parking lot negotiators were actually close to a deal with Iran, when Donny blew it all up by tweeting infantile threats. awesome job, you fucking idiot. take a victory lap. I mock all that shit in today's post. thank you for your attention to it. link is here: bit.ly/3QkGa5v
here's today's post: "four seasons total dumbfuckery: Donny blows up Iran negotiations with his own reckless mouth" — Dear Leader always makes things worse for himself.
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but you left the plums, so we're good
here’s a perfectly normal thing that happened with our perfectly normal president. recently, Donny was acting so erratically while military leaders were planning a rescue operation in Iran, that big strong aides with tears in their eyes had to go up to him and say, ‘sir! sir! why don’t you go play in traffic?’
last week, Donny was so out of control that his handlers had to hustle him out of the room for fear that he would fuck up a military rescue operation, because he wouldn't stop screaming at everyone. perfectly normal stuff, and I mock the shit out of it in my latest post. link is here: bit.ly/4cSLXYK
here's today's post: "a deranged Preznit Fuckwit screams at aides for hours — and ends up banned from the bunker."
Loser McLoserpants is worried about losing in Iran.
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here's today's post: "who’s the falling-down drunkest sewer clown of them all?"
Kash, Kash, he's our man — if he can't chug it, no one can!
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so, who’s the most shitfaced member of the Donnyverse? you could be forgiven for assuming it’s Piss-Drunk Pete Kegstand, the champagne-guzzling dunk-tank clown who grew up to be Donny’s Secretary of Death. after all, ‘piss-drunk’ is right there in his name. and sure, in the running would be US Attorney Boxwine, famous for regularly showing up for her on-air Fox News gig as a word-slurring, four-sheets-to-the-wind mess.
who's most shitfaced in the Donnyverse? no, it's not Pete Kegstand — and it's not Jeanine Boxwine. their antics can't compete with the drunk-as-a-skunk antics that Kash Patel gets up to. thank you for your attention to my sober look at the most inebriated cabinet ever. link is here: bit.ly/4mMkjA8
so, who’s the most shitfaced member of the Donnyverse? you could be forgiven for assuming it’s Piss-Drunk Pete Kegstand, the champagne-guzzling dunk-tank clown who grew up to be Donny’s Secretary of Death. after all, ‘piss-drunk’ is right there in his name. and sure, in the running would be US Attorney Boxwine, famous for regularly showing up for her on-air Fox News gig as a word-slurring, four-sheets-to-the-wind mess.
who's most shitfaced in the Donnyverse? no, it's not Pete Kegstand — and it's not Jeanine Boxwine. their antics can't compete with the drunk-as-a-skunk antics that Kash Patel gets up to. thank you for your attention to my sober look at the most inebriated cabinet ever. link is here: bit.ly/4mMkjA8
![Donny: [scrawls his fucked-up, klan-hood signature] “that’s a good one. oh, I wanted this one. you think Biden can do that? he can’t do that.”
‘that’s a good one’? my god, this narcissistic asshole is even in love with his own signature. he hoists us that document with the pride of a toddler who made it all the way to the potty without doing a boom-boom in his pants — which, by the way, is an accomplishment Preznit Fuckwit can’t manage.
Donny, you tiny and damaged homunculus, give it a fucking rest already. nobody in the world gives one shit about your infantile obsession with Joe Biden, aside from the sycophants and toadies who are paid to bark and clap like trained seals when the president makes a funny.
remember the Easter Egg Roll earlier this month? Donny pulled the same tired shit, blithering incoherently to a bunch of children about Joe Biden’s autopen, as if even one of those kiddies had the remotest idea what the fuck he was whining about.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:i3mhliziy2r37ytl2rof5e3h/bafkreie6jmxn6owg6wkvrms3jwnpphembcts3zgv66i4uirsxrthd5hoq4)
Donny: [scrawls his fucked-up, klan-hood signature] “that’s a good one. oh, I wanted this one. you think Biden can do that? he can’t do that.” ‘that’s a good one’? my god, this narcissistic asshole is even in love with his own signature. he hoists us that document with the pride of a toddler who made it all the way to the potty without doing a boom-boom in his pants — which, by the way, is an accomplishment Preznit Fuckwit can’t manage. Donny, you tiny and damaged homunculus, give it a fucking rest already. nobody in the world gives one shit about your infantile obsession with Joe Biden, aside from the sycophants and toadies who are paid to bark and clap like trained seals when the president makes a funny. remember the Easter Egg Roll earlier this month? Donny pulled the same tired shit, blithering incoherently to a bunch of children about Joe Biden’s autopen, as if even one of those kiddies had the remotest idea what the fuck he was whining about.
Donny Dipshit brags (again!) that his signature is better than Joe Biden's (who even cares?), and Krazee-Eyes Kash passes out drunk in his office. it's all in today's very strong post, the likes of which few thought possible. thank you for your attention to this matter. link is here: bit.ly/4mMkjA8
one tries to as often as possible
here's today's post: "who’s the falling-down drunkest sewer clown of them all?"
Kash, Kash, he's our man — if he can't chug it, no one can!
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friends, do you suffer from the heartbreak of Mamdani Derangement Syndrome? here’s one sure way to tell: it’s when you completely lose your shit over the activities of an anthropomorphized sports-ball mascot. welcome to the sad little world of Sid Rosenberg, a New York City hate-radio talk-show dumbfuck afflicted with not just anger management issues, but also way too much free time on his hands. Sid worked himself into a Big Mad this week when New York’s Islamo-marxo-communo-anarcho-fascist Mayor Zohran Mamdani showed up at a New York Mets game and got big hugs — not just from Mr. Met, but also Mrs. Met, both of whom are — and this cannot be stressed enough — oversized baseballs.
have you heard about the hate-radio dipshit who shat a brick because the Mets' mascots got friendly with Mamdani? also: Caitlyn Jenner's friendship with Donny can't save her from his admin's transphobia. I cover all that dumbfuckery and more in my "this week in stupid." link is here: bit.ly/4tnDTFk
it's Saturday, and it's time for "this week in stupid: April 18 edition" — Preznit Fuckwit stands his ground, Caitlyn Jenner comes around, and so much more...
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If you'd like to go back to the prosperity of the 1950s, Tax the rich and corporations, as they should be taxed, support Unions for fair wages & vote Liberal.
With thanks to Jeff Tiedrich for the quote.
Apologies to all the very funny people of bsky but Jeff Tiedrich is still the funniest. No one does righteous burning fury with cackling knife words quite like him.
going to war against the Pope was just as bone-crushingly moronic as going to war against Iran. in both cases, there was never any plan B — because these overconfident shitwits always act first and think never. in fighting Iran, there was never a thought of ‘well, what if they don’t surrender after two hours of bombing?’ — and in fighting the Pope, there was never a thought of ‘what if he tells us to go fuck ourselves?’
Mad King Donny went to war against the Pope and he lost, because he's a losing fucking loser who always loses. also in today's post: Donny has no idea what a 'corner store' is, because he's a fucking moron who always morons. thank you for your attention to this matter. link is here bit.ly/4sGOObV
did he ever go all potty-mouthed on Dr. Who?
here's today's post: "Pope Leo has had just about enough of Preznit Fuckwit’s shit" — truth and light vs darkness and filth.
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yes, I posted and then deleted the version with a typo, because Bluesky Jesus refuses to give us the Miracle of the Edit Button
my favorite Bible story is probably the one where Jesus starts an unprovoked, unnecessary and illegal war, blows up a building full of schoolgirls, destabilizes the world's economy, tells the Pope to go fuck himself, and then jets off for a long weekend of golf at Galilee-a-Lago
my other favorite Bible story is the one where Bluesky functions for more than ten consecutive seconds without crashing