TAPPING THE SIGN ONCE MORE

looking forward to the eventual Netflix documentary about the Northernlion Supercruise

just dipping the whole head of romaine into a bowl of caesar dressing and takin a bite

it is not inevitable or even likely that social media, as we know it, will exist for the rest of our lives. future generations will look much more harshly on this stuff than we do smoking.

i think the least they could have done was Brady Bunch this announcement asset a little more

governments love to see a tech trend at its most "bubble ready to pop" state and go "one billion dollars to [tech trend]"

I don’t even have words for this.

Wild that Altman is being sued by his sister for repeated sexual abuse and that doesn’t come up in basically every conversation about him. I get that it’s alleged but if that shit was happening to someone else I feel like that would come up, particularly if that person had a history of lying a lot.

the evil emperor cozying up to the pope’s idiot brother is so fucking renaissance, man. it’s so funny. the emperor is forming an alliance against the papal states and there is war in the holy land. there are rumors of plague.

man i’ve played enough Crusader Kings to know where this shit’s going

[INT. MIND PALACE]
the word TURDS appears in front of me. i swat it away. it is quickly replaced by TURDS in a different font.

Screenshot of Elmo next to his pet's fishbowl in Elmo's World. The subtitles say "We. Dorothy's been thinking abou and down to what’s her daughter."

four birds in a cartoon from Sesame Street, with the caption reading "Oh, shit"

Another Sesame Street cartoon saying "Oh shit"

Screenshot of Big Bird in Hooper’s Store with live human Alan and a flying red bird. The subtitles read: "Time for the birth of terror. Me"

Do not watch Sesame Street on Tubi with the subtitles on 😭. I swear, I didn't edit or add anything. Is it hilarious? Yes, but also, they need to fix this immediately. Absolutely incomprehensible and bad

is there anything more satisfying than making a really good soup without looking at a recipe

like, PROBABLY, but that’ll do for today

a photo on a rocky shore of a hand holding a glass bottle with a hotdog in it

i hope that someone gets my
i hope that someone gets my
i hope that someone gets my hotdog in a bottle, yeah
hotdog in a bottle, yeah

if you’re a dude reading this like “gawrsh this is awful what can i do” it is 100% to shut down your cousins / friends / bros when they do shit like this. Shame them. Impose social stigma for them lesser weevils who think harassing marginalized people in creative industries is OK

yuuuuuuup

"what's this NASA guy's name"

"ahhh... Marcus Aurelius"

"no dude it can't just be Marcus Aurelius, nobody's last name is Aurelius anymore"

"you're right man that's TOO much gravitas lemme tone it down. he's uhhh Marcus... Aurelius..." *looks down at pants*
"Belt"

(also i know it says September 2025 but this email is from yesterday)

an email from Murray's Cheese that reads: "Dear Cheese Lover, We’re writing to let you know about some changes we’ve made to our Website and App Terms & Conditions of Use, effective September 3, 2025.​"

we really fucked up the internet, man

[getting rejected at the bar] that's fine. actually my boys and i were thinking of diminishing and going into the west

its so funny that markov chains ended civilization

in that regard caves of qud really overperformed in its futurism

the space ghost from that one episode of The X-Files where there’s a space ghost

i’m so glad the Artemis II crew got home safe but i am like, a LITTLE disappointed they didn’t see this guy up there

if they don't step out of the pod onto the porch into a rocking chair and crack a beer what was the point

a fenced-off demolition site on a city block. the sidewalk is littered with maybe a dozen pairs of high-heeled shoes

what happened 😭

i’ve been thinking about it since and it really is an all-timer

ngl this is the first thing that's really made me want to watch Real Housewives

he still needs to be dragged out of office in chains btw. nothing has changed

turning 35 this week, so this morning i woke up and rolled around groaning "uuuuuuughhhhhhhh i'm older than Mayor Mamdaniiiiiii"

that's normal right? that's part of it

lmao ok go off

texts that read: oh it’s columbo he’s a baby look at baby columbo

i am watching the first episode of Columbo and they finally introduced Columbo