A blobbthirsty Mr. Blobby with tiddies.

I just learned recently that it’s not normal to breathe from only one nostril.

“… a rabbit gives up somewhere, and a dozen hawks descend”

The bene gesserit hallucinate and get face tattoos.

They’re just mumble rappers.

#dune #benegesserit

I have so many baseball hats, they call me the Houston Hat-stros.

A podcast host says "today on the pod, we have Ted from I have no mouth and I must scream." The host asks Ted, a gelatinous blob "how ya doin, Ted" Ted quivers in pain. The host looks attentive. Ted quivers in pain.

Art is everywhere.

a man with a beard is sitting in a crowd holding his finger to his mouth . ALT: a man with a beard is sitting in a crowd holding his finger to his mouth .

My brother and I are flexing on people with our jump hour Seiko’s and hand rolled sushi.

Afghan who fought for US forces dies in ICE custody as Trump on track for grim record Mohammad Nazeer Paktyawal served with U.S. forces in Afghanistan and legally evacuated the country, then died within a day of being taken into ICE custody, according to his family

Afghan who fought for US forces dies in ICE custody as Trump on track for grim record

www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a...

Everyone else sees the man dressed as a pot leaf too… right?

Fuck it. Everyone is 9. Not 12. 9 years old.

I suppose after two world wars it was Britain's turn to turn up late.

schools are never valid military targets, on or off base

if someone bombed a DoD school in Okinawa and killed a bunch of American 4th graders, that would be a war crime.

The murder of Iranian schoolchildren is a war crime.

I don’t think Iran’s Supreme Leader was in the Epstein Files for what that’s worth..

I bet the HOA wouldn’t say anything if I had a killdozer parked on the street.

fell for it again award

“We are living in the future, I'll tell you how I know.
I read it in the paper fifteen years ago.
Now we're all driving rocket ships and talking with our minds.
And wearing turquoise jewelry and standing in soup lines.”

-John Prine “Living in the Future”

Punch is a psyop to distract you from the Epstein files.

He is a pawn.

my favorite Mardi Gras memory came near the end of Fat Tuesday, at a dance party near the Slab. I turned around and saw a man holding a framed portrait of David Lynch. He rested his cheek against the glass and danced with it for like an hour

first they came for Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor, and I said nothing, but i did laugh quite a lot

I’m helping people who make more than me pay their rent that’s less than mine.
I’m mediating adults on how to express their feelings without crying.
I arrive earlier than my boss and his boss.
I stay later than my boss and his boss.
I’m more educated than my boss or his boss.
I can’t leave.

Image of the Yeti in the skiing Windows game SkiFree eating the player

Breaking: Tragedy at the Winter Olympics

“I am a great soft jelly thing. Smoothly rounded, with no mouth, with pulsing white holes filled by fog where my eyes used to be. Rubbery appendages that were once my arms; bulks rounding down into legless humps of soft slippery matter… I have no mouth, and I must scream.”

-Harlan Ellison

Me: Yeah, I’m anti-death penalty.

Them: Yeah? What about the people on the Epstein list?

Me: Have you heard of the Barbra Pit Massacre?

Bring it on.

Getting fried chicken from a gas station and the curb crushers are glowing and whispering to me.

Kristi Noem can’t watch the Puppy Bowl because she always shoots the tv.

I wasn’t meant for a 9-5.

I was meant to get day drunk and read Siddhartha.