My parents named me Keir but I changed it because I felt unworthy. Who do I worship now?

Takes a lot to lose to someone known as the nazi tattoo guy but Janet Mills seems up to the challenge

That got him. Platner is screwed now

A Billie Eilish documentary made by James Cameron sounds like something the cast of The Studio would try to talk Cameron out of doing

My favorite episodes of The Pitt are where done dumbass stumbles into the ER filled with wrong infirmation that wellness influencers have convinced them is right. They confidently believe things like "best way to have my child is refuse all treatment and assistance."

Don’t really want to get into this but trying to wish it all away from the butthole would be a waste of time

The number of people who swear that Phantom Menace and the other prequels are practically Shakespeare as oppressed to how everyone hated them 25 years ago means 25 years from now you’ll see middle aged people saying “BOOK OF BOBA FETT WAS MY CHILDHOOD”

I didn’t used to think like this…but…

I’m finally recovering from weeks of severe health problems. Some of you may remember I had a heart attack a few months back but the good news is this is unrelated and that there is now a second part of my body that’s falling apart

Graham Platner’s primary opponent, 78 year old Janet Mills, decided to run in a year when Democrats have gotten so sick of elderly corporate humping establishment types who run on a vow to change nothing that they’re willing to vote for the slur using nazi tattoo guy

Am I racist for assuming the phone call I just got from Kazakhstan was from criminals?

No one is sure how this will work but mission Fairfax is now number one in the polls for the 2028 Republican nomination

Last night several people were talking about a young nazi called Clavicular who overdosed because he’d made meth part of his workout routine. The worst part of this story is I now know all about it when knowing it is the last thing I would have wanted

I was forced against my will to find out who he is and that he claims to take meth for weight loss purposes

If Statler and Waldorf really hate the Muppets, why are they there every week?

I hope all you Hungarians know that Orban’s loss means you’re all going to be killed in your beds tonight by transgender illegal immigrants singing Pink Pony Club

Hasn’t he done that already?

JD Vance once again works his electoral magic

I’ve been very ill (not my heart) so haven’t been paying attention to anything. Have I missed anything awful?

Least realistic thing about this week’s Daredevil is that Bullseye was able to suck down an entire milkshake in one gulp and not get an ice cream headache

For this season of The Boys to be a true societal allegory, Homelander should get dementia

Whatever happened to the one Breaking Bad storyline every true fan cared about the most: Marie’s kleptomania?

Orban looks like Vance is making him dissociate

Thing that would restore my faith in humanity is if Trump informed his generals to prepare the nukes and they told him to fuck off

All we need to end all this is 23 sane Republicans…yeah never mind. Sorry Iran

FIFA might actually take back its peace prize now

Let's say a guy had that app and used it 45 times while watching the Jacob Elordi of Wuthering Heights. That's public knowledge now?

It’s nice to know that if Joe Biden had vanished for a few days then came back with fresh bruises, the press would have been completely uninterested

Planning to sue the makers of these cannabis gummies because somehow they teleported me to a Waffle House

My Punisher joke reminded me that one thing I love about the Disney+ Daredevil show is how much the Punisher loathes his imitators. They’re always trying to impress him by being straight up sadists and he either ignores, insults or kills them