I need to protect my family. You have no security system, Karen!

Samhain isn't evil spirits. It isn't goblins, ghosts or witches. It's the unconscious mind.

That's right, THREE horrific masks to chose from. They're fun, they're frightening, and they GLOW in the dark

An hour ago I stood up and fired six shots into him and then he just got up and walked away.

Hey, I got a town full of beer bellies running around in the dark with shotguns! Who's gonna be next? Somebody's wife? Somebody's kid?

Find out everything you can about Conal Cochran. He runs Silver Shamrock, the Halloween mask people.

Oh, yeah... I catch you gropin' my daughter, I'll use that shotgun on you. You understand?

Conal Cochran, the all time genius in the practical jokes. He invented sticky toilet paper.

It's the boogeyman! The boogeyman's outside!

An hour ago I stood up and fired six shots into him and then he just got up and walked away.

Enjoy the horror-thon, Doctor, and don't forget to watch the big giveaway afterwards.

That's right, THREE horrific masks to chose from. They're fun, they're frightening, and they GLOW in the dark

Don't you know what happens on Halloween?

He's waited for this night... he's waited for me... I've waited for him.

Hey, I got a town full of beer bellies running around in the dark with shotguns! Who's gonna be next? Somebody's wife? Somebody's kid?

Is this a joke? I've been trick-or-treated to death tonight.

Conal Cochran, the all time genius in the practical jokes. He invented sticky toilet paper.

Is this a joke? I've been trick-or-treated to death tonight.

This has not been my night. I spilled butter all over my clothes, they're in the wash. I got stuck in the laundry room...

I'm telling you Michael Myers is here, in this town! He's here to kill that little girl and anybody who gets in his way!

You mean from the Myers House? That little kid who killed his sister? But he's in a hospital somewhere!

Mr. Riddle was watching you? Laurie, Mr. Riddle is eighty-seven!

Halloween... the festival of Samhain!

I do love a good joke, and this is the best ever: a joke on the children.

He's gone! He's gone from here! The evil is gone!

Janet, get me some more coffee!

The last great one took place three thousand years ago, when the hills ran red with the blood of animals and children.

In order to appease the gods, the Druid priests held fire rituals.

An hour ago I stood up and fired six shots into him and then he just got up and walked away.

Harold, you want mayonnaise on yer sandwich? How bout musturd?