It did, aye! They're far too cautious now, unfortunately.

Billionaires these days just don't have any adventure-whimsy in their hearts.

A golden retriever has both paws up at a bank teller’s window.

“Are you the branch manager?”
“Yes I am, how can I help you?”
“I would like two branches, please.”
“How would you like that?”
“Two big sticks, four little sticks.”

I miss the days when millionaires (today's billionaires) would do silly 'adventure' things for lols and eventually we'd find their scattered remains.

A swan's arse in the air

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the river.

I say Karens, but it's mostly men. It's like accusations of Witchcraft.

I'm seeing the accusations on Insta where long established accounts and creatives with YEARS of evidence of their work are being accused of using AI to generate their images, all because Karens can't draw/paint/knit/weave/create etc

Something I've noticed recently is that creative, imaginative, and skilled people are more likely to assume AI as real because they understand how it would be made IRL (so why AI it?), while non-creative and unimaginative people are accusing real art and design of being AI.

It's fucking nuts!

Why did you do it again?

No, YOU woke up and sprayed Batiste into your armpits

Don't forget the clocks change into frogs this weekend!

Win the war by pissing a nation off with one too many minor inconveniences in a short space of time.

EMP? Nah, just make them enter the WiFi password again using only the remote, and remove toilet paper from their Tesco order.

They've swapped
Honeycomb Confectionery
for Money, Bombs,
Confederacy

Remember when "That Friday Feeling" wasn't a trepidatious one?

Someone please invent scissors that you can fit on to your index and middle fingers so you can cut your hair in the mirror without having the think back to front

If you're struggling to start a task, listen to Mammagamma by The Alan Parsons Project and visualise yourself montaging your task with superimpositions of yourself wearing a turtle neck jumper as the camera pans around your head. It won't help, it's just fun.

I thought about becoming a thoughtless person but, oh

Wtf's this torrential rain nonsense going on right now?

A childhood friend of mine was born in 1981 just after midnight on New Years day in New Zealand. I'm pretty sure she was the first baby born that year.

I think she's like the oldest Millenial ever.

Final boss millennial.

I forgot Beethoven's first name and momentarily convinced myself it was Vincent. Anyway, I'm experiencing bad Beethoven hair today and tried explaining this to the Postie as I handed him a parcel through a tiny crack in the door.

I've been using a foot file to file my fingernails like it's a tiny ukulele. I don't look so menacing when I do it that way

I've had Cake's The Distance stuck in my head for a week, which is pretty cool, but it gets so far then turns into The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

Rigor mortis sounds like a band that samples whale song with theremin instrumentals and it's really highbrow actually, but they'll sell the rights to a Coleman's mustard poem advert that encourages the nation to eat Sunday lunch

It's either like that 1950's Invaders from Mars film where aliens leave a weird wound on the neck, or it's rigor mortis

There's lucky!!

The actual saying is "Beware the IDEAS of March" because they're never good ones. Don't go having ideas this month.

A rectangle of lime green. The top half is slightly different to the bottom half because i'm really good at this. My score was 9.98

That's right, I *am* going to be insufferable

Dialed.gg

Screenshot of my dialed.gg game. "Results Okay, this is actually good. We hate admitting that" Top 1% of all players 47.00/50 9.92 9.85 8.59 8.88 9.76

Any of you played dialed.gg

That's all it was, wasn't it? If the ball went far everyone chanted ROUNDERS! ROUNDERS!

Does anyone remember the rules to Rounders?

A screenshot of a page that lists facts about eels. It says "3. What's That Smell? (Cont.)". There is a picture of an eel with animal print style markings that makes it look a bit like Pat Butcher. Under the picture it says "this ability to smell their quarry helps them to survive and thrive in the underwater"

Excuse me?