All this is missing is a suggestion to smile more

The 🍄 must be stopped before it infects any more authors!

Not me zooming in to check and make sure it's not my family heading south on 95 this afternoon

Two children’s books side by side. One is called Don’t Trust Fish, and the other is called Don’t Eat Eustace” (Eustace is a fish.)

*holding a gun in my shaking hands* “EVERYBODY SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME THINK FOR A SECOND!!!”

It's chime time, motherfuckers

Nah, you need the Triscuits but you flip them over so the salty side hits your tongue first and the cheese is stacked on the bland side

It's going to be a fun race to see if OPM gets my records before RFK jr makes all my medications illegal

That suit is amazing!

Impeach, convict, throw him into a volcano, apologize to the volcano then go out for drinks.

I’ve been thinking this would be a great moment for any Dem with Ambitions to get out there and be like “y’all, we have a splitscreen of two potential Americas right now, you ultimately cannot have both, you need to choose between Artemis II America and demented homicidal babyman America”

This way they can get Copilot's helpful edits that it's inconsistent to describe the same action as both a "small step for man" and a "giant leap for mankind"

If you want to live on Mars, go live in Antarctica. That's the closest you can get right now and I'd bet a lot of money those Mars guys would absolutely hate it.

Reo's podcast Tested is the best thing I wish nobody had to listen to because it should be one of those "ha, look how stupid and evil people were in the past" topics, but since Stupid and Evil are the guiding forces of our time, it is definitely worth a listen

What is even the point of having an Augustinian Pope if Villanova is going to get knocked out this early?

I love Osty so much and Osty won't even acknowledge my presence

Provide a safe environment and give it some time to feel comfortable and the Strait will open up to us

I want to watch the documentary of the making of this show where you convince all the contestants to work cooperatively and the network throws a fit because they don't get the footage they want to manufacture conflict for ratings

Screenshot of a post about voting for mayonnaise over garden slugs followed immediately by a Nigella Lawson post with a recipe for golden garlic mayonnaise

I know Bluesky doesn't have an algorithm, but this timeline "coincidence" shows how Big Mayo is trying to rig things in its favor

It's so exhausting. You think you get the respect of your (male) peers only to find they join in on trashing you as soon as they're alone

Oh thank God - I thought Tom Servo hit hard times and sold out

we couldn't use government funds to buy coffee (like, folgers ground coffee) when i worked on a CDC outbreak emergency response

It's "those dumb federal employees are a waste of space" but from the left

A million times this

I'm glad I set myself a minimum to donate if the Patriots are going to play like that

So openAI's commercial about Codex featuring science and tech didn't include any women because we're all too smart to use AI, right?

I actually agree that there is going to be a skill gap between people who regularly use AI vs those who refuse to use it, and it's that after the bubble pops the refusers will be fine while the AI-dependent will be missing or have let atrophy basic skills

Cake week will be lit next season!

2.718

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