never let a Wisconsinite order ur drink this girl for real looked the bartender right in the face & said ‘give us two shots of the most disgusting thing you have’

this lady was telling me she wanted white toast & followed it up with “i know it’s bad for me…” so i said “darlin’, i’m here to serve food, not to judge you.” & she fr looked right at me and said “I love you.” 🧍🏽‍♀️

twt doesn’t deserve these pictures but you do <3

200+ scientists are in the middle of a marathon livestream to show why weather and climate science is so important and needs all our help to continue.

It is here: wclivestream.com/watch

moving is so stressful but it’s also an excuse to make a scooby-doo lookin ass sandwich & get high while blaring disco music and THAT’S what life is all about

you ever shake yourself off after a particularly shitty relationship & realize you let an absolute loser make you forget who tf you are???

we need to get media literacy rates up, and quickly.

you’re never too old to over-relate to Troy Bolton. esp during his Scream era.

I love a lot of things on Dropout but even if I was just watching Dimension 20 paying less than $7 a month for like………. what, 80 hours of content per season??almost feels like a steal 💀

i could never have predicted how this sentence was going to end and i’m so delighted

had a nightmare i got bamboozled into promoting an ai generated movie & fr woke up sick to my stomach.

ever since pale pale moon dropped i really don’t know how to act right

community is telling aunties at the dispensary “what strain are the hot girls smoking these days?”

They practiced that one in the backyard 👯‍♀️

one of my TTRPG characters is like if Cowboy Carter was a superhero so I gave her a bulletproof Stetson as a bit and it’s actually proven to be my most useful ability???

sometimes i consider going to see sinners again just because i really do miss Sammie and the Smoke Stack Twins like they’re MY cousins.

just remembered this app exists and no one’s allowed to be mad at me because at the end of the day I’m just a bitch w ADHD and no object permanence

oh sorry it’s just that i saw questlove’s mashup of 50 years of music on snl and it did make me feel emotions about the beauty of the human experience as expressed through song and performance

i’m not working tomorrow and honestly thank god. seeing a happy white person would probably be my last straw.

working a service job in DC means getting mass emails from managers that we can’t call out just because of Inauguration traffic 🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️

if literally all i do in this life is convince people to listen to Midnight Burger and watch Trolls World Tour…….. i’ll die happy

cause of death: forgot to get a sweet treat at the grocery store

this is famously a safe space so i’ll say it here: i barely knew how to use tik tok this move to rednote may kill me. i’m too old to be migrating apps this many times a fiscal year.

mama a revolution behind you

best overheard Nosferatu review of the day:

“What fucking movie did Twitter watch?”

damn should I……… go see wicked again tomorrow? i’m probably gonna go see wicked again tomorrow 🚶🏽‍♀️

working the baby girl theater today and it’s absolutely surreal. like oh look there’s Nicole Kid man’s character experiencing an orgasm for the first time and here I am with your chicken tenders :)

I don’t think you understand. I am actually wheezing with laughter trying to picture a bear braiding hair.

The single best Wicked theory I’ve seen is that Dulcebear did Elphie’s micros.

update: someone made an oopsie and did not properly list this showing as a sing-a-long so this could potentially be the funniest day ever