Press junkets in 2015: “please sit here and listen to the same 3 questions from 200 websites you’ve never heard of”

Press junkets in 2025: “Eat these inedibly spicy wings. Now take a lie detector test. Now do a little dance for the TikTok.”

The sequel to 8 Mile no one asked for: losing a rap battle so hard you end up suing your own record publisher for allowing you to get so thoroughly demolished in public

Tim Robinson saying “WHAT THE FUCK” in the Darmine Doggy Door sketch

Getting @ mentioned at work

Outside: “yes, yes, this seems like a good approach, I have the context for this conversation”

Inside:

Me on PTO: Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!!

Me back at work: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck.

Say what you will about the state of the world, five years ago the concept of a hyper realistic cake was so wild as to be meme worthy, and today it is so commonplace that we have game shows where people do it daily. If trends continue, I predict cakes will reach sentience by 2035.

I only think about bicycles, rain or shine, work or no work. Live the dream my dude

im sorry im sorry im trying to delete it