Well my one other full time coworker just quit and walked out in the middle of the morning on Friday so I am not in fact getting fired 😔✌️

Catching wind that my office is interviewing has me all giddy hoping maybe they’ll finally fire me 🤞

GASP!!!!

Goth girls night out w my sis

I need a root canal and a crown 😞

Im tired already

My tamagotchi died yesterday rip 😢

mfs will be basically 100% sure they’re lactose intolerant and then ask for 4 different cheeses on their pizza smfh

Really need to stop letting myself get so wrapped up in people because why is getting iced out socially at work ruining my life

Why do pets choose the most inconvenient times to scare the shit out of you

Every time I start to feel a bit better about work something always just has to knock me down lol

This fkn windowlicker

My hair has been going gray since my early twenties so it’s never really bothered me but for some reason seeing my eyelashes eyebrows and pubes start to do it is really disturbing to me lol

Well, well, well. If it isn’t that thing I wanted forever but suddenly no longer care about.

Inshallah, he will get closer to God.

Bought a buttload of frames to put up a bunch of art and prints I’ve collected over the years up. Putting this handsome boy in the bathroom to judge you on the pot

My bf told me my birthday is in four months and I just started crying lmao

Bitch [*endearingly*]

a woman pointing her finger at the camera with a blue fence in the background ALT: a woman pointing her finger at the camera with a blue fence in the background

Stopping at the Buc-ees on the way up to Dallas and seeing the other emos making the pilgrimage to the MCR show

I just want to see MCR again without having to drop $300+ on one ticket is that so much to ask 😭😭😭

Why my nipples always trying to abscond from my bra 😒

Sewed those bitches back on wrong smdh

Every headline hits like this

It actually had grown taller than the stick its on but it flopped over during a tantrum. It needs a bigger pot lol

danny devito in always sunny in philadelphia saying "you would have to be a real lowlife piece of shit to be proud to be an american"

I am a mother and I will protect my hideous disgusting child

It’s so thirsty, throws a tantrum every single day and I just keep feeding it for some reason. Probably would not have done this if I thought my life would become little shop of horrors but here we are

Thought it would be cute to try growing a little tomato plant inside and it’s grown into an absolute monstrosity, come to realize it’s an indeterminate variety and it can grow up to like 8 ft 😵‍💫 but I don’t have the heart to let it die at this point

I think I’d do great as a professional turd polisher

I need a new job so bad but can someone just do the interviews for me 😭

I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m actually a really horrible person! 😊😃😌