Real “As Seen On TV” store in a dying mall vibes

a woman is sitting in a chair with the words " this semi-charmed kinda life " on the bottom ALT: a woman is sitting in a chair with the words " this semi-charmed kinda life " on the bottom

“We were singing about sex on crystal meth and we LOVED IT!”

“Ok grandma, let’s get you to bed.”

I maintain that Matchbox Twenty is the most underrated 90s band ever. They always get left out of the retrospectives

When I thrifted the vintage recliner in my library, I didn’t have a bad hip. Now I do, and sitting in it hurts. Just add one more thing to the pile of things that joint pain ruins

Nothing is selling in ours. Crammed merchandise that just sits there because it’s junk

“Help elect XYZ to stop XYZ!” I did, bro. Repeatedly. And all we get is stern letters.

Reporting all political texts as spam, regardless of party. Stop harassing me when you do nothing but ask for money

Not posting a pic because too many thirsty people found me last night, but I went to the pool for the first time of the year and compared it to the first day of last season. There’s about 30 pounds difference and holy moly 😍

Smoke from Georgia wildfires is blowing into town and my eyes and lungs took that personally

Our library stays incredibly busy all the time. People are still reading and getting their kids to read.

Hearing 🎶think I’m gonna die in this house 🎶 because I have to be out of the house on a Wednesday, and Wednesday is old people everywhere day

I’m on this medication and my cholesterol, blood sugar, and liver enzymes are back to healthy levels. The weight loss is just a bonus. It is actual medicine. Hope this helps.

What a fucking clown show. If you use FedEx, they’ll deliver to the wrong address. If you use UPS, it will be late or “attempted delivery” when you’re in the house. And the post office does this kind of bullshit

My package arrived at my local post office and then got sent to another state. What the absolute fuck

Thank you!

Sorry for the lack of alt text! I missed it in my frustration with uploading. It’s me in a witch costume holding a copy of Stephen King’s retelling of Hansel and Gretel. I’m standing in front of a yellow bookshelf.

Thank you!

Thank you!

Thank you! I feel incredibly lucky to do what I do

It worked! Finally

Book character day 🖤

I love my job

I knew you’d understand 😂
It sounded like a direct ripoff lol

Somebody wrote a book they described as “a heavy metal infused Faustian nightmare” and I’m not gonna say anything to them but unfortunately Grady Hendrix already did that one with We Sold Our Souls

The tech bros really did it this time

I have tried 3 times to post a picture. I give up.

“Bah bee cue” come on now it’s right there

Sir that WAS a southern accent. It’s ok that you’ve never been to Charleston

If you understand this reference, you’re a weirdo like me

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Peach cobbler is always worth the risk