Comic based off a tumblr text post about a guardian angel. The angel's dialogue is as follows: "it's meee I'm your guardian angel hiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 so. in about six months, you're gonna die of starvation. 🥺 and if I don't protect you, I will get: #fired! 🫢 and that is No Good 🙅‍♀️ hahaaa So. 🙏 I looked into causes of starvation, and it turns out: Your death is totally preventable! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 There's more than enough food to sustain you without interfering with anyone else's survival, but you're not allowed to have it!"

Continuation of the comic, the angel says: "🤨 Whaaat? 🤷‍♀️ Apparently, your death is premeditated by thousands of things called "shareholders." So. 🙏 I've been killing people," with an art style change from cartoonish to devious anime girl when she claims to be killing people.

I love this text post so I drew it

Secret of mana cover photoshopped to say “secret of nana” and has added a photo of a shushing nana

is joke

they made gay sex woke

i need to retract my previous statement. it was wrong of me to say "the greeks can eat my dick". it was offensive and inappropriate. only my boyfriene eats my dick.

just ate a lemon

i am only about halfway, but so far season 3 of the mandalorian seems like some executive said "we think audiences would like to see less of pedro pascal". wrong! i want him in my mouth

i've ridden in a one horse open sleigh and it SUCKS! it is not "oh what fun" at all! pretend i made this tweet like a week ago. also i've never actually done that

woke up early and was bored so i decided to do some Arena limited EV calculations

for all of these, i'm going to assume you're paying entry fee in gems, with EV units in $ - the conversion rate i'm using is 200 gems = $1 (because you can buy 20k gems for $100)

i employed heavy use of WolframAlpha

i think i could still use the 39.95 one

today i can finally drink out of these coffee mugs that i have inexplicably already owned for several years

i had underestimated the extent to which riot games wanted me, specifically, to play their new fighting game.

📰TEEMO ANNOUNCED FOR 2XKO!
He will be joining the roster in the Early Access on October 7th!

its AOL instant messenger so its certainly not recent lol

so there's this uh, well it's considered a legend really. basically whenever a roman did something really good they were awarded a triumph. it was like a combination parade in your honor and medal and key to the city sort of deal, impossibly prestigious. but, according to legend, one element of the triumph was to have a slave stationed behind the pedestal you are paraded around on, constantly whispering "all glory is fleeting". i'm like that but i say "your dick is small"

found this on my work pc while looking for, let's say work. happy birthday @coolcab.bsky.social thanks for always keeping me honest

It's got enough room for me & the whole squad ⚔️

Reddit user sunnyd843 writes: im high rn and i had a vision of a balatro tarot that would "enhance up to 2 cards to be gay" and they wouldn't change at all visually or mechanically but you'd know they're gay now though

The Balatro subreddit is one of my favorite places on the internet

galios shield of durand. grant an ally +0/+3. heros horn: draw a champion stormcalling: manifest a titanic unit and summon 2 sigils of the storm

funny infinite for the last day of the titan event. modifiers make galio champion spell free, and the heroes horn gets you another galio from the deck, which becomes his champ spell which is free which etc.

theyre hard

i think over half my nautilus adventures have had twisted fate as the support champion. i don't know how i keep getting him, but all his cards are very good for naut so i'm happy to keep picking him

each time i attack strike, swap me with the ally to my right, then recall it

I CANNOT BE STOPPED

first time i've had this interaction come up: if you attack with level 2 ahri to the left and level 2 elder dragon to the right, ahri's ability doesn't bounce elder dragon. that would count as being stopped, i guess. and he cannot be stopped.

deep and i am a sea monster

deep and i am a sea monster

the titans of runeterra event is cool so far. playing flashy expensive cards is usually pretty bad in LoR, so it's neat they made a mode where that stuff is a bit more viable.

oh yeah thats a good one

alright cool, successfully got the LoR monthly challenge done the first day of the month. and i didn't lose any runs this time so i think this is locked in at 48th place if i understand how this scoring works

i should never equip found fortune to a champion, i always draft a card that messes it up at the first possible opportunity

Black bunny and brown/white bunny pushing a red treat ball. The ball is blurry in motion.

Black bunny and brown/white bunny pushing a red treat ball. The image is blurry in motion.

ORB

hold up, forget what i was gonna say, this would slap

my family is dead & he is pogging

A screenshot from a Granblue Fantasy raid, with an error code reading: Error Code B-001-09009 Network Error

"You should play Granblue Fantasy, the gameplay is fire"
The gameplay: