Slightly, a Lost Boy
Not that my heart is a stopped clock.
Not that I even think of it at all, come to think of it. To tell the truth, I've long since regarded such things as more or less inevitable, particularly at three in the morning. There is, quite naturally, the perambulator to consider, and the smallness of you tumbling out of time so long ago, it might as well have been yesterday, for what that means... That sort of set-up can make you emotional.
But my ways are logic, lately. I tell myself you are happy with your gift.
I see you, there much pleasure in your flute, fashioned from a branch, and you are dancing! Dancing to your self! You are merry, and you are grateful for that tree. I don't think you are lonely, not especially.
Truly—I don't. You have company.
I don't think you give much thought to it, quite honestly. Still, I ponder the story, its radical departure. Maybe someone is sleeping on the job. I've thought of that. A lacuna in my heart, this morning night. The boys stay lost, but not really, not really when you come to think of it, which mostly I do not. It's just that it's three in the night of morning, and I do that hauntological thing with the pages. I guess this is what happens when you get to my age.
Not that I miss you. Not even, Slightly.
Something strange happens to time when you get older. Over the past few days, it’s dawned on me that Roddy Lumsden has been dead six years this coming January. A poem I wrote about incorrigible Roddy—my early mentor, my friend, and then not my friend, but always my friend.