With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars.

We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director.

Please stand by for more.

this was predictable, but i don't feel all that good about it. among other things, if she can't fly out of the country she's just gonna wind up driving more.

A solemn and reflective little black ants everyfuckingwhere season to all who observe

This is right up there with when I forgot the name of the movie "Requiem for a Dream" and searched "movie with Jennifer Connolly ass to ass" and it gave me the correct IMDB page

A DuckDuckGo search for "word for structural hard thing in some boots, I thought it was shunt but I guess not" with the answer: "The term you are looking for is "shank," which is a stiff piece of material in boots that provides support and stability. It is typically located between the insole and outsole, helping to maintain the boot's shape and reduce foot fatigue."

This nonsense method of searching is why I like the DuckDuckGo AI search

30 years ago today, Principal Skinner purchased fast food to disguise as his own cooking at an unforgettable luncheon with Superintendent Chalmers.

#TheSimpsons episode “22 Short Films About Springfield” first aired April 14, 1996.

The “Calvin’s dad explains two types” meme, inspired by a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon. Clockwise from top left: 1) Calvin’s dad walks into frame to find Calvin trying to operate a record player. The dad says: “There are only two industries left in America: gambling, and fraud.” 2) The dad shows where the record goes, and how to turn on the player, while Calvin watches. Dad says “Derivatives? Gambling. AI? Fraud. Video games? Gambling. Social media? Fraud.” Calvin says “yeah”. 3) With one hand open palm up, Calvin’s dad cheerfully explains to Calvin out of frame below him, “The stock market looks like gambling, but it’s actually fraud.” 4) In bed in a dark room, Calvin clutches at his pillow, eyes wide in existential terror. There is no text in the panel.

this is fake and I don't even care

it's still a mood

this is how you know that the big accounts that you love are actually a business probably run by multiple people, we are looking down the barrel of a nuclear holocaust and they have found time and energy to post about wrestling action figures Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.... • 2m Was in a store today and walked by a bunch of pro wrestling action figures and one was Eric Bischoff, and I know no children are buying these things but I like to imagine a child sitting down watching WWE with his favorite character, action figure Eric Bischoff

No! It’s because I’m disassociating!

An ad for something called "Last Meadow Online" with a "DIDN'T ASK" dismiss button

I appreciate that this discord ad or whatever it is I got after updating used a relatable mood instead of basic dismiss/close text

(that's how they getcha)

A SKEALATIN WHOSE DEMOSTRATING DA REALISTIC GRAPHIC'S OF A MODERN SYSTEM "OUTTA MY WAY I NEED TO SOLVE A PROBLEM THAT DOSENT EXIST, CAUSING SEVERAL MORE PROBLEMS ALONG THE WAY" WELL IT SOUNDS BAD WHEN I WRITE IT OUT THAT WAY ,,,,, DASHARE.ZONE ADMIN

MOVE - dashare.zone ADMIN

The dungeons in Oblivion have to have been procedurally generated, right? Just from a time when that was pretty universally considered "cool" and not like laziness?

And it was considered cool until pretty recently, too- the procedurally generated everything in No Man's Sky was sort of the point.

That being said, don't pay too much attention to things like speed of light or distance or time or temperature when any of these things are provided in numbers as none of the math checks out consistently from one part of the movie to another

I saw Project Hail Mary last week and my first reaction was that it was sort of overhyped, and while it was a very good movie it wasn't the best sci-fi movie ever, which it seemed like people were implying

But it's been growing on me as time goes on, and now I think I agree it's up there

I had so much fun with it, it's like a modern Oblivion with parrying and Elden Ring dungeon design

But like a modern Oblivion, the jank adds character (later in the game there are multiple bits of dialog with voice actor errors/retakes, for instance)

It feels like it was written by an AI- the story and main character are nothing and all his dialog feels like it comes from a soundboard

I've quit playing better games

If you are looking for something with heart and fun despite the jank, Tainted Grail Fall of Avalon is much more worthwhile

although, only one of these games feels like it was created by algorithms and it isn't Claire Obscur

Crimson Desert Exec Responds As Players Complain About Controls

“Think of it like riding a bike, it comes naturally after you learn it. Just takes a minute. I'm agreeing with you, saying that it takes time to learn, but it comes naturally after you do.” - Will Powers

Crimson Desert has dropped to a “mixed” Steam review rating, with most of the complaints revolving around the controls. Now, the PR and marketing director at developer Pearl Abyss has responded. https://bit.ly/4sy0huY

Hi, my name is piglet and welcome to jackass.The picture shows winnie the pooh, standing on a stump on top of a bucket on top of a drum with a hat on the right hand side, it shows piglet on a makeshift seasaw with a branch and a rock, and a beehive is above him

behold, bargain bin verso

Okay, so I've played a bit of Crimson Desert and you can't remap the controls on PS5 and I've been playing FO76 recently so keep trying to open my map with the touch pad and instead zooming in on my character's goofy ass bargain bin Verso face, lol

Was curious about Crimson Desert, knowing basically nothing about it, so I'm watching streamers play it

At first it looked like a generic Assassin's Creed clone and now it looks like a 1 to 1 clone of Witcher 3's Novigrad, and just Novigrad?

If someone had told me the new Super Mario Bros movie had the theme from the Super Mario Bros Super Show as an easter egg I would have tried watching it much sooner

ChatGPT: you’re so right, Leto Atreides II. Merging with a worm would give you unconscionable power that you, alone, could wield — you, alone, could be trusted with. You wouldn’t be committing a genocide. You would be saving humanity

Guy who made 800 million dollars selling a website named ToodleCo to Yahoo in 1996 and has done nothing since then but now has $100 billion: the concept of “human kindness” was invented by bolshevik psychologists in 1953, no one heard of that term until then

Podcast Host: fascinating, I have worms

The best way to describe Portland is that their roundabouts have stop signs.

NBC News poll Voters hold negative views of Al. In fact, the only topics less popular in the survey were the Democratic Party and Iran.

Truly a perfect news alert