okay. who cares?

She is the best pure talent currently on the national stage.

The Mets won a fucking baseball game.

put his number in the rafters. i’m barely kidding.

LUKE WEAVER, YOU SAVAGE.

YOU HAVE WORKED MIRACLES ON ME 😭 #Mets #LFGM #LGM

I NEEDED THIS SO BAD!!!!!

I’m very confused. After 9 innings, the Mets had more runs than the other team. What does that mean?

I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!!!!!😭

You’re telling me Trump’s “please Virginia vote against redistricting or my presidency is over” gambit failed miserably?

“Oh no did someone take your attempt to rig the midterms and turn it around on you?”

watching Republicans whine about gerrymandering

Man, what a win for the Blazers. Tom Dundon's going to be waiting at the airport to greet them. Primarily to make sure they all choose the "Wait and Save" option on their Ubers, but still: it'll be nice!

Congratulations, Virginia! Republicans are trying to tilt the midterm elections in their favor, but they haven’t done it yet. Thanks for showing us what it looks like to stand up for our democracy and fight back.

Victor Wembanyama has entered concussion protocol after hitting his head on the court during Game 2 of Spurs-Blazers.

I think this is the thing to remember about Hasan Piker. No one knows who he is.

I'm going to republish this one. It deserves to be archived properly.

Spent Saturday with President Obama and New York's Cutest — turns out my first name is Mayor and I need to be doing more squats. 

Here’s to building a City where families can thrive and every classroom is full of this much joy.

In February 1777, General George Washington ordered the first mass immunization campaign in American history by mandating that his troops be inoculated against smallpox. He protected the Continental Army from an epidemic that was deadlier than British forces.

249 years later, we have this idiot.

That is awesome.

Dylan Cease looks like Wes Anderson said “I need someone to portray a pitcher in one of my movies who looks like he’s from the 1970’s.”

overtime playoff hockey. it's sports crack and I need it

InfoWars Let me tell you a story. When I was a child, I suffered from night terrors. It was always the same dream: I could hear my family and neighbors wailing…

Some timeline stuff:
— We expect to get InfoWars.com after the judge clears it in a couple of weeks.
— We'll build a world of characters on the site and across social media. Tim Heidecker is in charge, and we have grand designs.
— Visit theonion.info, buy a subscription, help us dominate the world.

Infowars’ endless afterlife The Onion may finally boot Alex Jones from his studio, but years of damage have already been done.

NEW: How exactly has Alex Jones avoided paying the Sandy Hook families a single dime of what he owes? I wrote about it here, and spoke to Chris Mattei, an attorney for some of the families, and Lenny Pozner, the father of the youngest child who died at Sandy Hook: www.motherjones.com/politics/202...

Say what you will about the worst members of the Roberts Court, but they all make sure their wives are in on the grift.

Jane Roberts, Martha Alito and Ginni Thomas are equal partners with their husbands in the grand project of destroying the United States and enriching themselves in the process.

Sorry to be overly sincere for a second, but here's why we decided to persevere through all of the bullshit and take over InfoWars.

There's just gotta be a line somewhere.

Thank you @pablo.show for letting me talk so openly about this.

looks like if you put a wax figure of Joe Lieberman into the microwave

bsky.app/profile/notu...

The Onion just on an all-time run right now

Trump Library Saga Takes Dark Turn: Where Did Millions in Funding Go? Four huge media conglomerates forked over $63 million in “settlements” earmarked for Trump’s presidential library. Democrats are trying to track that money—and the latest developments don’t inspire co...

SCOOP --> Paramount, Meta, and X are refusing to say what happened to their huge contributions to Trump's presidential library after Sen Elizabeth Warren raised questions about its fund getting dissolved. Ds say tens of millions remain unaccounted for.

Details here:
newrepublic.com/article/2092...

Who knew that negotiating for world peace is nothing like cutting a deal for concrete with the Gambino crime family?

LOL.