We need to talk about the rise of "smol bean fascism" where you have all the guns and the immunity but the really scary people are the ones with whistles and phone cameras and they're giving you generational trauma and ptsd by filming you killing people for no reason

It’s a terrible bill. It will literally kill people. The most vulnerable among us will suffer as the wealthiest benefit. It’s perverse. I wish there were something I could do. But alas, I am only a U.S. Senator from Alaska whose “no” vote would kill the bill. So I voted yes. You get it.

Tell my wife I love her very much
Ground control: …uhh,

I like the Andre 3000 flute album, I think it’s nice

why does joe biden look like this?

[walking into the fire department holding a burning sofa cushion] Do you guys take walk-ins?

It’s his orthotic

Don’t know how Democrats could make it more apparent that their entire reason for existence is simply to discipline the left and not to actually win political power

I haven’t decided whether shootings are good or bad, I keep waiting for Quinta to tell me via sitcom 😢

The Huy Fong product shortage is the single greatest crisis facing humanity today

Choosing to believe this is the same bug and that it got fucking huge

Saw a cool bug, now you have too

thinking about the Passion of the Christ x Wellbutrin NASCAR car

Can I borrow $12,000 from someone, it’s important

I just wanted to see some baby ducks at the state fair but had to hear Nikki Haley rant about abortion on the way, gross

Something called “Frank’s RedHot Injector: Injectable Marinade” a jar of spicy red goop packaged with a syringe

Using my first post on here to say what the fuck is this stuff, what are we doing